F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,354
I feel bad but the people in my life cannot help me regain the will to live. I don’t want to be around people who care about me while I’m a miserable wreck who cannot function well in life. I have to pretend to be ok all the time and that is really hard. I think my oncoming suicide is the result of repeated heartbreaks and maybe to an extent resentment over feeling like I was fucked from the start and set up for a hellish unsuccessful existence. I can’t get passed the betrayal of evil parents and the evil of the government. The government is complicit in much unnecessary suffering, bc it creates the kinds of situations that often disadvantaged kids are born into. It’s not inevitable that a child has to come into a shitty environment if there weren’t vested interests in providing incentives for parents not to be good parents.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,354
I still care very much about how my suicide will affect my husband and sister. I can't stop thinking about it. But, it's not enough to make me stop. I really have no choice, financially. I refuse to be homeless.
:'(
 
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FTL.Wanderer

FTL.Wanderer

Enlightened
May 31, 2018
1,794
Since joining SS has been the only time in my life I'm glad I have absolutely no one else. I am one of those people we read about who die and the only clues to their death are the mounting uncollected mail in their mailboxes (or slots) AND the rancid odor coming from their weeks-long putrefying bodies. Ideally, I'd like to go in the deep, deep wilderness, though.
 
ultraviolet sin

ultraviolet sin

RUDEBOY
Jul 17, 2018
93
I purposefully estranged myself from my siblings and dad. They live across the country. They’ll never know I’m gone. I’ve got a mom and wife then who I will probably destroy, but they have support systems and won’t be left alone. Life insurance payout should let her get a house if she even wanted.

Whatever, she’ll be set for options. :I
 
S

ScaredOfLife

Arcanist
Jul 9, 2018
441
I purposefully estranged myself from my siblings and dad. They live across the country. They’ll never know I’m gone. I’ve got a mom and wife then who I will probably destroy, but they have support systems and won’t be left alone. Life insurance payout should let her get a house if she even wanted.

Whatever, she’ll be set for options. :I

Does your life insurance policy cover suicide? Not everyone's does. Luckily mine does.
 
ultraviolet sin

ultraviolet sin

RUDEBOY
Jul 17, 2018
93
I feel bad but the people in my life cannot help me regain the will to live. I don’t want to be around people who care about me while I’m a miserable wreck who cannot function well in life. I have to pretend to be ok all the time and that is really hard. I think my oncoming suicide is the result of repeated heartbreaks and maybe to an extent resentment over feeling like I was fucked from the start and set up for a hellish unsuccessful existence. I can’t get passed the betrayal of evil parents and the evil of the government. The government is complicit in much unnecessary suffering, bc it creates the kinds of situations that often disadvantaged kids are born into. It’s not inevitable that a child has to come into a shitty environment if there weren’t vested interests in providing incentives for parents not to be good parents.

I really care about educating the next generation..we would need bright minds to lead the country when (I would have) retired. But then you see kids unable to afford basic school essentials, teachers paying out of pocket, cutting corners in the most important budgets we have. So yes, that was in reference to the poor kids who are at a disadvantage to succeed.
 
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Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
I still care very much about how my suicide will affect my husband and sister. I can't stop thinking about it. But, it's not enough to make me stop. I really have no choice, financially. I refuse to be homeless.
When do you expect to be homeless by?
 
S

ScaredOfLife

Arcanist
Jul 9, 2018
441
When do you expect to be homeless by?

Probably in the next couple months if they take away my income. Even if they don't take it away, though, I will ctb at some point simply because I'm too scared of life to keep going. Every little thing overwhelms me.
 
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ultraviolet sin

ultraviolet sin

RUDEBOY
Jul 17, 2018
93
Has anyone else, for example, encountered an overwhelming situation, but then, it just fades away? Knowing it’s temporary destroys the threat for me. :p
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,354
I really care about educating the next generation..we would need bright minds to lead the country when (I would have) retired. But then you see kids unable to afford basic school essentials, teachers paying out of pocket, cutting corners in the most important budgets we have. So yes, that was in reference to the poor kids who are at a disadvantage to succeed.
Yep our education system is about equality of outcome not equality of opportunity. So if u happen to be above average IQ in public school there’s a good chance this will harm your future potential. Because they cater to the lowest common denominator in gov indoctrination camps.
 
F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,354
Has anyone else, for example, encountered an overwhelming situation, but then, it just fades away? Knowing it’s temporary destroys the threat for me. :p
Yes every so often i have a crisis situation and I blow it out of proportion lol!
 
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M

misunderst0od

Member
Jul 22, 2018
27
I still care very much about how my suicide will affect my husband and sister. I can't stop thinking about it. But, it's not enough to make me stop. I really have no choice, financially. I refuse to be homeless.


I wish I had at least gotten to the point in which I could be with and marry the person I loved. I wish for one second I could call this person my husband. But I can't. I know you have your reasons and I respect that, but to each their own. I would have loved to have been married to someone who loved me. But I will never have that.
 
F

Fixin’ToDie

Member
Jun 11, 2018
95
Starting to care? Never have. I don’t have anyone to care about (except for a brother who I’ve estranged myself from) so I’m fortunate in that respect.
 
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F

Fixin’ToDie

Member
Jun 11, 2018
95
Since joining SS has been the only time in my life I'm glad I have absolutely no one else. I am one of those people we read about who die and the only clues to their death are the mounting uncollected mail in their mailboxes (or slots) AND the rancid odor coming from their weeks-long putrefying bodies.
That will be much the same scenario for me too, I’m afraid.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
Some people commit suicide to purposely hurt the people that hurt them.
 
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sadak_the_wanderer

sadak_the_wanderer

An appropriate painting
Mar 19, 2018
243
I care, but to be honest, billions of people will be completely unaware of my passing. For the ones I do care about, I've noted their reactions when others die. The list of people affected in a meaningful way would fit on one hand, and no thumbs required. For those, I am trying to find a way to offset the coming event.