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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

typically not in the mental frame to converse..
Jul 1, 2020
5,598
REAL friends specifically. fake friends arent any better than no friends. laughing with them when theyre laughing at you, smiling, pretending that youre fine with everything, going along with things just to feel accepted.
 
Sans

Sans

I'm going to burn myself alive in public!
Oct 2, 2019
274
Sure did. Got ripped on for being autistic and unattractive. Whenever I fought back, it was me who got in trouble. Strangely, while I'm glad those years are behind me, I'm somewhat nostalgic for them. Maybe it's just because back then I didn't have to worry about stupid shit like paying taxes.
 
Brianiskillingme

Brianiskillingme

Slowly Dying Inside
Jan 18, 2022
149
I was the fat girl. From 1st grade until 12 was hell. I never went on a date, wore square clothes. I had a tormenter, he was awful. I lost a lot of weight and went on to marry a cheater. Then my next husband died. Brian is a narcissist and discarded me tonight. Life sucked since I was born.
 
B

ButterflyWings

Member
Jul 3, 2022
11
Yeah. I always felt like an outcast and I never spoke and I ate lunch alone every day :/ I remember one time I tried to say something and every one said the classic, "wait, she speaks?" (that used to piss me off so much), and people used to say stuff like, "I didn't even know you were in this class" (cause I was so quiet).
 
annique

annique

gave up on trying to make sense of reality
Jul 5, 2022
141
i was bullied for being too thin and not living with my parents, also i was called nerd and was left out of any group of friends, i've only had a few friends here and there throughout high school
 
lessonlearned

lessonlearned

Member
May 23, 2022
77
Yeah. I always felt like an outcast and I never spoke and I ate lunch alone every day :/ I remember one time I tried to say something and every one said the classic, "wait, she speaks?" (that used to piss me off so much), and people used to say stuff like, "I didn't even know you were in this class" (cause I was so quiet).
"I didn't even know you were in this class" ive heard that one too before unfortunately
 
dirtnap

dirtnap

Member
Jun 7, 2022
61
Middle school was the worst for me. I had no friends, was teased on the school bus, tormented at school for being ugly. It was rough. Once the entire cafeteria started chanting a horrible name that they always called me and began banging on the tables. I just put my head down and cried. The teachers did nothing.
High school was better. By that point I was considerably less awkward (I’m still awkward now lol) and more invested in my appearance so I wouldn’t get targeted by bullies. I learned how to improve my looks to blend in.
It still sucked but I was able to avoid the daily trauma that I experienced in middle school.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

She dreams of eternal sleep
Sep 24, 2020
16,631
Yes. It was beyond awful. I have many bad memories. I hated studying and having to be around cruel people. It just made me feel even more suicidal. I think that schools are just a way to torture people and it is cruel making young people endure that all for the sake of it. I wish that I found a way to leave this world back then.
 
swab

swab

Member
Aug 31, 2019
27
Awful. Never felt like I belonged appearance wise and personality wise so I was a fucking loner most of the time besides having made some 'friends'. But since I'm incapable of maintaining relationships due to my self hatred and fears of abandonment I really didn't have any. To be frank I didn't deserve them even if some were kind of treating me shitty. Plus parents were always dissapointed. The older I got the more a faillure i became towards myself and others. Can't forget the amount of teachers pittying me. So yeah school was really amazing.
 
hellispink

hellispink

i dont know what i am
May 26, 2022
407
I used to hide in the bathrooms at lunch time. I couldn’t stand eating by myself. I used to get looked at badly and asked into why I was eating lonely. I suffered from heavy social anxiety and was very anxious before every class. I would also get bullied a lot, people would say I was quiet and would start rumors about me, such that I was this and that. They called me also little feminine and a lot more. I dropped out in senior year because I couldn’t stand it anymore. I ended up in a psychiatric ward after that. I was able to get the diploma online after they gave me a chance. The worst nightmare and most painful memories come from that time.
 
W

waitingforrest

Elementalist
Dec 27, 2021
847
I used to hide in the bathrooms at lunch time. I couldn’t stand eating by myself. I used to get looked at badly and asked into why I was eating lonely.
I did this too. It was always so humiliating to have every kid say the seat was taken or saved. Sitting on the bathroom floor was the worst and it would smell terrible. And you can just get to hear outside all the other kids laughing and having the best years of their lives while you sit alone in a dirty bathroom.
 
lofticries

lofticries

obedear
Feb 27, 2021
1,413
The worst. And it was all for nothing. A lot of the shit taught I never used in the real world. Also it did shit with helping me socialize. In fact it made my anxiety even worse. I shouldn't have to go to a place to be shitted on for free.

The kids were terrible in general. Always talking behind everyone's back about eachother. Because I was the quiet kid I heard a lot of shit I didn't want to know. That's why I was never salty about not being popular in highschool. Cuz popularity just means more of your shit being broadcasted among enemies and friends alike. It's probably still like that in the adult world.
 
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Alcoholic Teletubby

Alcoholic Teletubby

Rip in piss
Jan 10, 2022
198
Everything is related to school, I swear. With no one to interact with, how the hell are you going to pass the time or grow as a person? Or if you do, they're the ones harassing or inconveniencing you.

I'm almost certain that my family would be relieved if I were gone.
 
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deleted

deleted

Wizard
Jul 31, 2020
625
I spent the last year completely alone just talking to answer the call, it was also the time I tried to hang myself for the first time, and if I repeated the same series I planned to throw myself in front of a truck
 
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freedompass

freedompass

Wizard
Jan 27, 2021
616
My worst bullying was at my two primary (elementary) schools. I was one of those vulnerable, loner-ish kids from an early age, compounded by being fat from 9-11. Kids are just vile to each other, what can I say. I consider myself very fortunate to have gone to a selective girls high school where bullying just wasn’t really a thing. There was a social hierarchy but I wasn’t right at the bottom so I seemed to blend in, kinda, and had friends. I hated PE, wasn't good at sport and dreaded being picked last for team sports which happened a few times. Way to destroy children’s self esteem.
 
Not_A_Seagull

Not_A_Seagull

Member
Jul 6, 2022
36
Everything is related to school, I swear. With no one to interact with, how the hell are you going to pass the time or grow as a person? Or if you do, they're the ones harassing or inconveniencing you.

I'm almost certain that my family would be relieved if I were gone.
I just wanted to ask a question….
 
H

HappyForever

Cheated death
Feb 14, 2021
234
I've never cared about friends. It's the lack of a romantic partner that really hurts.
 
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Anon1337

Anon1337

Experienced
Oct 1, 2018
291
It was horrible. First one I dropped out of after a few months because I had no friends and it finished late in the day. At the next school, I made no friends because I joined when everyone already had friend groups and I was shy. I was looked down upon and ignored. I would bring my food home or eat in the bathroom to avoid the embarrassment of eating alone.
 
achromatic

achromatic

hedgehog dilemma
Oct 18, 2022
142
I was severly bullied in middle school. High school was empty and dull- present 27% of time during first year, then 50% second, then covid virtual learning. Finished school only thanks to pretty good grades and psychiatrist notes as reasons for absences (and it was private catholic, thought very "presitigious" academically xd)
Never been to house party or prom.
 
MellowAvenue

MellowAvenue

👻
Nov 5, 2020
520
First 2 years were awful, I had my first serious suicidal ideation my freshman year. Got picked on, didn’t have many friends, was a massive underachiever. Home life wasn’t much better and I was embarrassed to have friends over TBH so I didn’t make much effort in trying to make them admittedly.

Last 2 years, honestly, weren’t as bad. Wasn’t picked on as much, a bit more comfortable in my own skin at that time. Still not many friends but I dated a bit around this time which was nice I suppose.

I dunno, high school is actually my “wish I could go back” point for myself. A lot of my current issues I feel stem back to how I handled, and wasted, my high school experience. Obviously I’ll never really know if taking any of the opportunities I let pass me by would have kept me from feeling the way I do today but it’s still nice to think about.
 
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𖣴 nemo 𖣴

𖣴 nemo 𖣴

...member...
Dec 15, 2021
172
I have a lot of funny memories from high school (aside from the mild depression creeping up and some incidents that were probably my fault for not always hanging out with the right people) it was mostly a good experience. My parents did have high expectations but I was over-achieving at the time, although that's not saying much since I went to a crap high school with a bad reputation. Having said that, most of the teachers were genuine, caring and up for a laugh and I noticed that in the last 2 years there was a lot less bullying, kids became more chilled out and less cliquey which was nice. For me, the problem wasn't high school, friends, or dating, it was the daily violence at home during that time, so I avoided going home and stayed out late as much as possible.
 
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