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adam&eve

adam&eve

Student
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
191
I’vehadenough said:
Unlike you guys, something really did happen to my face. I was beautiful, then a guy attacked me and I look so horrible, I can't even get a date. So yes, it is the reason for my ctb
Can't live without my identity
OMG, I am so sorry! What did he do to you, I hope he rotts in hell.
 
Intotheflames

Intotheflames

a stranger in a strange land
Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
139
Yea kinda I wish I was the opposite sex. Put aside the fact that I can't do transition, even if I did my height, my bones structure etc are already fixed, I would never be the person I wish to be.
 
shadowchaser

shadowchaser

Joined
Aug 1, 2019
Messages
279
I do and I hate myself for it because it just feels so frivolous, even though when others say they go through the same I feel it's completely valid. My mind says be smarter, and then turns and immediately abandons all reason :) I'm both glad to see I'm not alone and sad that there are so many who can relate.
 
nautilus

nautilus

Member
Joined
Sep 8, 2021
Messages
20
Wrennie said:
I used to be okay with my body before a horrible drug interaction damaged my connective tissue beyond repair. Now I’m utterly miserable and look double my age. I also jumped out a window so my body is covered in scars now. My newfound appearance is my main reason for wanting to die, aside from drugs annihilating my libido and my parents’ abusive behavior toward me.
Gosh, I didnt realise and can relate completely. I did the same re:jumping and scarring. Lyme has messed up my skin, teeth and connective tissue too. I used to be okay with my body once too.Its become my main reason for ctb, I'll admit. Don't want to be a lonely man in his 50s or older. It's different now... all my peers have settled down and have stabity while still enjoying life. I feel like the freak who's too ill and devoid of any confidence whatsoever. That'll never change now.
 
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ohangiedontyouweep

Member
Joined
Sep 1, 2021
Messages
8
It’s not the only reason but being unhappy with my appearance is definitely a factor and contributes to my nonexistent self esteem. Makes me wanna hide from the world and never leave the house.
 
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kappa

kappa

Student
Joined
Apr 2, 2019
Messages
190
Has anyone done any type of therapy relating to your body dysmorphia?

I started going back to therapy this summer once a week. I keep bringing up my dysmorphia. I was told last session that basically nothing can be done about it and his focus was more so on other things.

It’s really distressing to deal with. For 10 years I’ve been late or very close to late to work because I don’t leave on time. I never “look right” and have to keep checking myself before I leave, which ends up taking too long.

I also hyper focus on my clothing and how it looks on me. As a teenager I was constantly told how I didn’t look good and was asked if I knew that, pretty often by my mother. She’d comment on how my clothes didn’t fit and it looked bad. Sometimes I have to change my clothes multiple times because I look horrible in them.

I see him again tomorrow and may request a new therapist after 4 years of seeing him.

Does anyone have any positive stories or experiences with trying to help your disorder? I’m self image for sure is tied in with my agoraphobia.
 
nautilus

nautilus

Member
Joined
Sep 8, 2021
Messages
20
Yes.. i had therapy for body dysmorphic disorder. I dont know if it was the therapy or the SSRIs that changed things miraculously. I think it was the SSRIs to be honest. But ive really injured by body now which changed things