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InezSerrano

Student
Dec 3, 2021
130
I can get Nembutal, but I can't get Sodium Nitrite. I'm pretty convinced I'll regret suicide. With SN, I know I can go to the hospital and have them save me, but IDK about N. Can they save you? I wish I could find a place to buy SN, you can buy almost any drug on Tor but not SN for some reason.
 
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InezSerrano

Student
Dec 3, 2021
130
Maybe it's not your time yet & you also don't need to search in a black market for sn , it's on the surface
All clear web sellers I've found don't ship to residential addresses.
There is no reversal agent or "antidote" to Nembutal. All they can do is provide life support and wait to see if you come out alive.
Fuck. I really worry I'll get more suicidal, buy N, and regret it. Fuck.
 
Harriet

Harriet

Member
Nov 24, 2021
79
I can get Nembutal, but I can't get Sodium Nitrite. I'm pretty convinced I'll regret suicide. With SN, I know I can go to the hospital and have them save me, but IDK about N. Can they save you? I wish I could find a place to buy SN, you can buy almost any drug on Tor but not SN for some reason.
You shouldn’t do N unless you are absolutely 100% as survival is unlikely. And if you are ‘pretty convinced’ you’ll regret suicide then you should concentrate on recovery anyway x
 
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InezSerrano

Student
Dec 3, 2021
130
You shouldn’t do N unless you are absolutely 100% as survival is unlikely. And if you are ‘pretty convinced’ you’ll regret suicide then you should concentrate on recovery anyway x
Well the worry is that I get very suicidal, it comes, I'm suicidal when it arrives and I take it, and then I regret it. Obviously right now I'm not suicidal enough to buy N, but I will likely be in the future. I almost did, but it felt like a waste of money, and I thought I may be able to find SN, but I've basically given up on finding SN, as even people on Tor forums didn't know of a source. (I posted on Dread, I may post on some Tor image boards too).
You shouldn’t do N unless you are absolutely 100% as survival is unlikely. And if you are ‘pretty convinced’ you’ll regret suicide then you should concentrate on recovery anyway x
Well with Sodium Nirite it's no issue. Right now I worry I'm not actually suicidal to do anything. Either way, the issue is not me now, the issue is me in the future. For a while I only knew about haning, too painful, now I know about SN &N, there is a good chance I order some when I feel suicidal (I did order SN, but shady seller and slow shiping). But yeah, when I'm more stable, of course N is dumb, but I have to make a plan for the future. IDK.
Well the darkweb image board deleted my post about SN, so it really is hopeless.
 
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Quiet Desperation

Lonely wanderer
Dec 7, 2020
117
With SN, I know I can go to the hospital and have them save me
With all due respect, relying on this to save you is one of the worst ideas I've ever read on this forum. SN is highly lethal and the smallest delay or mistake (and not necessarily by you) would mean your death. Even more so with N; there are reports of some people who don't even finish drinking it before they're unconscious. For both options once you are unconscious you are effectively dead without intervention.

If you're this convinced that you will regret it, maybe it isn't your time.
 
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Soapie

Soapie

Dying with love
Mar 26, 2021
67
If you believe you'll regret it I would highly highly recommend looking into other options. I always looked at suicide as a sort of last-ditch escape and its definitely not something you'll want to do without absolute certainty. Take your time to consider your options: support systems, crisis and mental health services near you, getting on medication, things like that. I know this site is obviously very suicide-focused, it's in the name after all, and I think its easy to look at it and say "oh, this is the be-all-end-all solution to everything." I promise you that if you do not want suicide, it could very well do more harm than good. Around here you'll see lots of folks comparing the right to suicide as a pro-choice vs pro-life dichotomy that you'd see with abortion, and the same things really do apply with abortion that they do suicide. Pro-choice means you have a right to choose, not that you're obligated to do it. All I'm sayin' is take some time to really think about this okay? Make the choice that's right for you
 
I

InezSerrano

Student
Dec 3, 2021
130
With all due respect, relying on this to save you is one of the worst ideas I've ever read on this forum. SN is highly lethal and the smallest delay or mistake (and not necessarily by you) would mean your death. Even more so with N; there are reports of some people who don't even finish drinking it before they're unconscious. For both options once you are unconscious you are effectively dead without intervention.

If you're this convinced that you will regret it, maybe it isn't your time.
I thought a doctor could easily save you from SN if you got to the hospital in time. Is this not the case? I am suicidal, but I have really bad anxiety so I always worry I'll regret it.
If you believe you'll regret it I would highly highly recommend looking into other options. I always looked at suicide as a sort of last-ditch escape and its definitely not something you'll want to do without absolute certainty. Take your time to consider your options: support systems, crisis and mental health services near you, getting on medication, things like that. I know this site is obviously very suicide-focused, it's in the name after all, and I think its easy to look at it and say "oh, this is the be-all-end-all solution to everything." I promise you that if you do not want suicide, it could very well do more harm than good. Around here you'll see lots of folks comparing the right to suicide as a pro-choice vs pro-life dichotomy that you'd see with abortion, and the same things really do apply with abortion that they do suicide. Pro-choice means you have a right to choose, not that you're obligated to do it. All I'm sayin' is take some time to really think about this okay? Make the choice that's right for you
I have felt this way for a long time. Really, I just want to know I have a good way to die so I that I don't try something dumb and ruin my life instead of ending it. I did find a seller who seems to ship to residential addresses, it should arrive on the 12th, so we will see if it does come. Either way, having Sodium Nitrite and Domperidome (I believe my doctor will give it to me, but I have some coming in the mail as well) makes me worry a lot less about suicide.
 
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PeacefulTonic

Enlightened
Aug 10, 2021
1,016
I thought a doctor could easily save you from SN if you got to the hospital in time. Is this not the case? I am suicidal, but I have really bad anxiety so I always worry I'll regret it.

I have felt this way for a long time. Really, I just want to know I have a good way to die so I that I don't try something dumb and ruin my life instead of ending it. I did find a seller who seems to ship to residential addresses, it should arrive on the 12th, so we will see if it does come. Either way, having Sodium Nitrite and Domperidome (I believe my doctor will give it to me, but I have some coming in the mail as well) makes me worry a lot less about suicide.
There are no guarantees. That window period of being saved would most likely be different for everyone