cccitrus

cccitrus

i just want death and
Aug 14, 2018
40
So, i'm just living my life. Watching memes and laughing at my own terrible jokes. Just "living life"
But not the way i want it to and i don't mean like "i want to be a succesfull person" or "i wish i was lucky with relatipnships", but in a simple yet complicated way.
I always say i want to do stuff like meeting up with a friend or going on a trip but- i never do it. I want to start taking pictures of beautiful sceneries or moments- but i never do it. Oh, i should draw that's a nice idea and- no, i never do it.
I'm actually just making up all these things and memories and kinda live in a dream which is never becoming reality
I mean that's a human thing, right.
But at some point it becomes a pressure and i feel like i won't wake up

Does anybody of you feel the same way/knows what i mean?
 
Midnight

Midnight

Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
625
I always say i want to do stuff like meeting up with a friend or going on a trip but- i never do it. I want to start taking pictures of beautiful sceneries or moments- but i never do it. Oh, i should draw that's a nice idea and- no, i never do it.
I'm actually just making up all these things and memories and kinda live in a dream

I'm not really following here ... Do you have a hard time to actually do things after saying to friends you want to go out or is everything you want to do a dream to you?
 
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cccitrus

cccitrus

i just want death and
Aug 14, 2018
40
I'm not really following here ... Do you have a hard time to actually do things after saying to friends you want to go out or is everything you want to do a dream to you?

It's still a dream then. For example i lie and say something like "Oh sorry, i got sick suddenly" or "I have to babysit, i can't come sorry"
I am a shy person but my best friend is my family so I don't get why i'm making up things.
Well sorry, it's really complicated and weird lol
 
Midnight

Midnight

Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
625
It's still a dream then. For example i lie and say something like "Oh sorry, i got sick suddenly" or "I have to babysit, i can't come sorry"
I am a shy person but my best friend is my family so I don't get why i'm making up things.
Well sorry, it's really complicated and weird lol

I understand now. No need to apologise. Everyone has their problems here.