- Aug 17, 2018
I've always been like this to some degree all my life, when alone. Never thought anything of it. I've always had a wild imagination. But in recent time it has become much more prominent due to the direction my life has gone. I can't have children, I'll never have a family of my own, I'll never have a girl. Hopes and dreams, every sense of purpose....gone. My life is over. So I'm always basically stuck in my head imagining all of the things that would have been. And I'm constantly imagining myself with my girl or my children, and I imagine them speaking to me, and have conversations with them. I'm not hearing voices or anything...it's only my imagination. I'm alone all the time. So when I am up in the morning and about to make coffee, I'll imagine my son walking up next to me asking if he can have a cup. Or that my girl is getting ready for work. Or talking to my kids and teaching them about life. All kinds of stuff. I'll be walking through the supermarket imagining that my kids are walking next to me, and I'll walk by the oatmeal and imagine my son being like, "Look daddy! It has dinosaur eggs in it! Can I have it?? Pleeeeeaaaseeee." It's depressing as fuck. I guess it's some type of coping mechanism. Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this?