2

286165

Member
Aug 6, 2018
46
I’m very angry at myself for not dying earlier. Every time I’ve let someone talk me out of it, or things got slightly better and I thought I’d be ok. Then something else happens, and I get so mad for not just going through with it. I can think of every time I should have died, and how much trouble I could have avoided if I’d done it then.

Once I get my car back, I’m going to start putting everything in motion. I don’t want to be at this point again, I want to end it like I’ve wanted to for years.
 
S

shadow11

Wizard
Jul 31, 2018
620
Yes I'm angry, angry with myself for taking a medication I should have researched and now it has me in this place
 
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Reactions: mellow and lv-gras
2

286165

Member
Aug 6, 2018
46
Yes I'm angry, angry with myself for taking a medication I should have researched and now it has me in this place
Yes, I read in another thread that your medication has not been agreeing with you. I’m very sorry for that. Taking something that is supposed to help and only ends up hurting must be very trying on you. I hope you are freed of it soon, by whatever means you choose.
 
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shadow11

Wizard
Jul 31, 2018
620
Yes, I read in another thread that your medication has not been agreeing with you. I’m very sorry for that. Taking something that is supposed to help and only ends up hurting must be very trying on you. I hope you are freed of it soon, by whatever means you choose.
Thank you I appreciate that. I am to the point that some days if I had the means I would just go ahead and end it. I ordered a rope and hope I have the courage to use it when the time comes.
 
Brokenanddeadinside

Brokenanddeadinside

Specialist
Aug 8, 2018
395
I’m constantly mad at myself I’m a huge screwup. I’ve made so many bad decisions that have cost me a lot. Worst decision I made was selling my place because I was self destructing bad using drugs and decided to move to change my life which just ended up being another huge mistake. I then went through all the money in a year during a hypomanic phase and then got screwed over by people.