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I

I want to end it

Arcanist
Apr 29, 2018
423
I joined this forum in April, so I'm one of the earlier members. I'm feeling a bit of pressure to ctb, seeing earlier members like sonnenblume, tiredman etc. who have all ctb'd and I'm still here.

I do have legitimate reasons, mainly practical reasons. But there is always the argument "if you really wanted to ctb, you would have done it already".

Does anybody else who joined this forum early relate to this?
 
skyofAuroras

skyofAuroras

-
Apr 10, 2018
136
Kind of. I've also been here since April, and I do feel a little jealousy towards earlier users who have already ctb. There is the thought of why am I even on this site if I'm not sure about wanting to die. But I know no one will think ill of me if I decide to stay around, and no one here would ever force someone into suicide.
 
D

Deleted_9cKnXB34QG

Mage
Jun 26, 2018
502
Yeah, kinda. I still remember the original SanctionedSuicide sub lol.
I've been around for way too long, twiddling my thumbs and overthinking my method while others actually get their shit together and ctb. Eh, I can't even kill myself properly >.>
 
Aponia & Ataraxia

Aponia & Ataraxia

Experienced
Jun 24, 2018
235
There's only 3 reasons for why one would not carry out their entropy-given task:

1. they desire an event(s) in the future, aside from their exit

2. they have not fully-processed their emotions and risk: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Postponement_of_affect

3. they know that their method does not "hold water" --something is not quite right, or is just plainly unappealing/unsafe ("survival instinct")
 
acher

acher

Member
Aug 6, 2018
12
Things have been going downhill for me more rapidly and now I'm considering it way more seriously, so in that regard I at least feel more desire to end it. I would say that I do feel a bit of pressure, yes.
 
acher

acher

Member
Aug 6, 2018
12
It's not caused by anyone here, just seeing other people ctb makes me feel guilty. I hate myself so, so much.
 
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