K

Karenbaker

-
Jun 17, 2018
63
Death is all I think about anymore.
I think if you don’t fear death your not a rational person - everyone perhaps fears death because for me two things, fear of the unknown although I suspect death is pretty much like being under during an operation in a hospital you have zero knowledge of anything ... and fear of the pain your going to leave behind with other family members
 
B

bygone

Member
Jun 3, 2018
13
Fear is the only thing keeping me alive right now. I have everything I need to be able to end it. Every day I hope today will be the day I overcome my fear and end it. I've spent the whole morning just trying to psyche myself up to be able to do it.
 
Samuel

Samuel

Wise
Apr 25, 2018
243
Fear is the only thing keeping me alive right now. I have everything I need to be able to end it. Every day I hope today will be the day I overcome my fear and end it. I've spent the whole morning just trying to psyche myself up to be able to do it.
What's your method?
 
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angie

angie

need to exit
May 25, 2018
482
Fear is the only thing keeping me alive right now. I have everything I need to be able to end it. Every day I hope today will be the day I overcome my fear and end it. I've spent the whole morning just trying to psyche myself up to be able to do it.


i know the feeling im scared too ,wish i could just get over it like others have
 
angie

angie

need to exit
May 25, 2018
482
if i was sure i wouldnt fail id go ahead but i worry sooo much about the amount anti emetics to take ?
will they make meill n prevent me taking the N ?
will the N be so awfull i wont be able to drink it ? all these things r my dilemma ,sure its same for others if i knew it would be ok i wouldnt hesitate , i just cant think of another way apart from hanging and i probably would get it wrong ,least u dont need to worry about anti emetics or horrible taste stuff lol
 
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angie

angie

need to exit
May 25, 2018
482
has anyone ever taken 60mg anti emetics in one stat dose .thats what ppeh niscke recommends
 
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M

musicislife

-
Jun 15, 2018
159
if i was sure i wouldnt fail id go ahead but i worry sooo much about the amount anti emetics to take ?
will they make meill n prevent me taking the N ?
will the N be so awfull i wont be able to drink it ? all these things r my dilemma ,sure its same for others if i knew it would be ok i wouldnt hesitate , i just cant think of another way apart from hanging and i probably would get it wrong ,least u dont need to worry about anti emetics or horrible taste stuff lol
That’s what terrifies me about the stuff it’s a hell of a lot if money to throw down the drain if it’s simply undrinkable !! Keep reading it tastes like rotten milk I mean c’mon really ??? Do a taste test let some milk go warm and off date and take a sniff if you can drink that you can drink N sadly I’m too weak
 
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RainAndSadness

RainAndSadness

Global Mod
Jun 12, 2018
1,543
No. I'm kinda excited to finally escape all that suffer. All the pain and struggle will be gone. And knowing I'll have a peaceful and painless death with N really takes away all fear from leaving this world forever.
 
D

Decker

Member
Jun 12, 2018
95
if i was sure i wouldnt fail id go ahead but i worry sooo much about the amount anti emetics to take ?
will they make meill n prevent me taking the N ?
will the N be so awfull i wont be able to drink it ? all these things r my dilemma ,sure its same for others if i knew it would be ok i wouldnt hesitate , i just cant think of another way apart from hanging and i probably would get it wrong ,least u dont need to worry about anti emetics or horrible taste stuff lol
 
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FTL.Wanderer

FTL.Wanderer

Enlightened
May 31, 2018
1,791
As other here have already said, fear alone is keeping me around. Hope died quite a while ago. No friends. No relatives. No community. Work online--and I'm not needed there, just a laborer. When my cash runs out, though, ctb will be far, far, far more appealing a choice than homelessness.

My fantasy is for a state to start allowing us to just walk into a clean, compassionate, welcoming clinic to have it all painlessly taken care of. I wouldn't even mind being pre-wrapped in plastic.
 
Imaginos

Imaginos

Full-time layabout
Apr 7, 2018
633
No. Quite the opposite, really. Thinking about suicide/death can be really quite comforting. Truth be told, it's one of my favorite (if only) past times at this point. Actually doing it, however. That's a different story. In the moment, right as I'm about to take the last step. That's where my fear would strangle me into submission. I'm too weak & lazy to even get that far, frankly. Taking it all in is more depressing than anything else. As I sit here I'd say I'm more scared of how much worse life is going to get for me as I continue to age & decay, squatting in the ruins of my dark corner, rotting away on a fucking worthless rock that I wish with all my being could just disappear forever. What can someone like me do in the face of all this? What?

 
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Definitelyworried

Definitelyworried

Member
Jun 19, 2018
555
Yes I get very scared. But why do I keep thinking about it. Must be something even more scary that leads me to that thought.
 
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