• Hey Visitor,

    In light of recent events, all community members in the US should reach out to their representative in regards to the Stop Online Suicide Assistance Forums Act that has been introduced in congress. This bill, if passed, could criminalize this community and hold it liable for simply hosting information.

    You should be able to locate and contact your represenative by going to this website. You can also contact Lori Trahan, the one spearheading this bill by calling her office at (202) 225-3411 or by leaving a message on the contact form on her site.

    One of the best ways to combat this is to make your voice heard. We're not political activists, but we made this notice to let you know that you do have a voice and that you do have representives that represent you in congress.
Volodja

Volodja

New Member
May 4, 2018
4
Hi everybody, I am here because I really like this community, and I hope to find some friends to talk to.. English is not my mother tongue, so I will have some difficulties in expressing myself.. I don't know what to say, I just feel like a 12 years old in a body of a 26, I never had any kind of relationship, but I fell in love many times and very easily, and always with the wrong people :) So, I think I experienced only unrequited/platonic love in my life, and sex has never interested me or attracted me outside an emotional bond, that's why I'm still virgin and I consider myself an asshole because I cannot be like my peers. I have always been asocial, living in isolation, with constant suicidal thoughts since I was 15 I think, and I had imaginary friends at 18/19, they were like ghosts and I could hear their voices too :).. Some years ago, following a period of various disappointments and frustration, I started to cut myself. I really like it because it is a distraction from my negative thoughts, physical pain replaces mental pain and it's good..it can become an addiction too but I don't really care about it. I have never cut my arms because they are too much exposed, so I preferred the upper body, and now I have a lot of horrible scars on its sides ahah..but I don't care.. A few days ago I tried to ctb cutting my veins down the arms (not across, I know it's useless), but it was too difficult, cuts were too much superficial because the razor was bad and I didn't pressed a lot, and I lost very little blood.. I don't know if I will try it again. I don't know if I want to die or to live, I am so confused. I think that a relationship could take me out and makes me happy but...well..the thing is, I don't know if I really want to be happy, I don't know how to explain, but I like my depressed/suicidal state of mind, I find it special in some way..or maybe I am so addicted to these negative feelings that I like them and I don't want to get well...anyway that's why I have always been attracted (and sometimes fell in love too) to girls and women with mental illness, depression, antisocial or self-destructive behavior, schizophrenia etc. I consider them like me and I like them so much..after all, finding a sort of soul mate is only a common desire. It could sound strange but one of my wishes is to die together with someone I love, if she wants to, in a romantic suicidal pact where life or death do not matter anymore.. Sorry if I have written too much, sometimes I'm too verbose.. :)
 
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F

FakeNews

Student
Apr 30, 2018
150
Being like everyone else is so fucking boring. Most of this world is full of self obsessed, small thinking, and uncaring individuals. I think it’s great that you’re different and hope that someday you think so too.

I’d caution against looking for outside ways to “fix” yourself (whatever that might mean) — whether it’s relationships, drugs, or something else. Having tried all those, I’ve come to the conclusion that the only real solution (for me) is within myself — because it’s the only person I trust (well, most of the time.)

Anyway, welcome and hope you find comfort in this community.