Do you think that recovery is possible for you? Do you want to recover or just to die already?

  • I think that recovery is possible and I want it.

    Votes: 27 24.1%
  • I think that recovery is possible, but I don' want it.

    Votes: 7 6.3%
  • I don't think that recovery is possible, but I wish I could recover.

    Votes: 40 35.7%
  • I don't think that recovery is possible and I don't want it.

    Votes: 11 9.8%
  • I don't know.

    Votes: 20 17.9%
  • Whatever

    Votes: 7 6.3%

  • Total voters
    112
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,103
No, I don't think a full recovery is possible for me; I'm mentally ill, not crazy. :hihi: Fortunately, I'm not obsessed with things I can't have & neither is my partner.
 
DynamicDepression

DynamicDepression

Failed Writer
Mar 28, 2022
298
I don't think recovery is possible for me, no matter how much I wish it could be. Too much is fundamentally wrong to hope for a miracle.
 
Darkover

Darkover

Elementalist
Jul 29, 2021
893
good luck fixing a brain injury modern medicine can't even detect a mild traumatic brain injury, so no recovery isn't possible for me but i do wish i could get better and continue living my life but thats never going to happen so this is goodbye
 
Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Paragon
Mar 13, 2020
941
I believe it's Possible but not probable. My hope for recovery has been fading and fading.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: WaterHemlock
FatalSystemError591

FatalSystemError591

(He/him) "Just another fallen angel"
Oct 12, 2020
217
It is possible for others but I consider myself too far gone. Wish I could remain optimstic but all that is left is just to figure out a way to cope until I die/CTB
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Huntfish34
WhiteDespair

WhiteDespair

The Temporary Problem is Life
Oct 24, 2019
836
I have tried too much to feel its possible. But would LOVE to if i could because i loved life prior
it's weird. it's like a struggle between the past self and the current self. like, old stuff is boring but new stuff requires effort. almost as if it's more learning to like life for what it is at the current time.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
17,665
I think recovery is possible for me, but in the same way that losing all my hair during a total eclipse on Arbor Day while listening to the Marine Corps Band playing Home on the Range and watching a Badminton match between two guys named Ichabod is also possible.
 
Lullaby

Lullaby

🌙
Mar 9, 2022
446
I’m not sure. Logically, I totally think if I put in the work, I could get to the point where I want to be, but I’m just tired now. I’m finally at the point where I’m genuinely trying to make an effort, but I’m exhausted from all the years of this.

Part of me wishes I had taken my treatment seriously when I was younger, maybe it would’ve made a difference.
 
Cosmic dust

Cosmic dust

Among the stars
Feb 28, 2022
160
What exactly does recovery even mean? Liking life? Just not planning to kill yourself? Not having your mental/physical illness anymore?
Good question, I supose its subjective.

For me, to achieve a state where I am satisfied with life, at least enough to consider myself happy and to not want to kill myself. That implies improving my mental health, between other things.

I will never forget all the years of pain and life is never going to be perfect, but could be better.
 
Last edited:
gottablast888

gottablast888

Member
Apr 15, 2022
89
i wish i could be who i was before OCD and live for longer with my family and die after my parents but i cant cope with this
 
Al Cappella

Al Cappella

Are we there yet?
Feb 2, 2022
905
I’m in something from there’s really no recovery per se, but it can certainly be managed to where it’s not entirely ruinous. In theory, anyway…
 
N

noname223

Visionary
Aug 18, 2020
2,515
I think my chances for full recovery are 85 % no happy end, 15% a somewhat happy end.
I still think a rational suicide in my future is very likely. Life has humiliated me a lot. I am pretty sure the worst times are for me yet to come. It is sometimes very surreal. I think for me it is rational that the future will be way way worse. I am very dependent on my parents also financially, I think poverty will drive me to ctb.

Currently I sometimes can enjoy things. But I have extreme anxiety about the future. There are so many problems I cannot solve no matter how much energy I invest. I try my best but I think this game is rigged against me.

I am currently in recovery btw. I had a tiny success but I know this won't be enough to save me.

Though my worst time will probably be when my parents are dead. So this can take a while: I try to postpone my suicide, do escapism and try to win despite the odds are against me.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: WaterHemlock
X

x_riverrock11

Enlightened
Jan 24, 2021
1,734
I think "recovery" is a misnomer that has set me up for disappointment. The idea that I could return to some undefined, pristine state of "before" is inspiring, but I think it's more like trying to bend plastic back into shape after you have dented it. You might get something approaching the original shape, but it won't ever be as strong as it had been, and you will have to handle it delicately. That vision of what is means to "recover" has to be good enough for me because it's all I have left. I've tried and failed too many times to return to some mythical life without depression; my damage is here to stay.
 
onlyanimalsaregood

onlyanimalsaregood

Unlovable 💔 Rest in peace CommitSudoku 🤍
Mar 11, 2022
1,146
I don't know what full recovery means. Right now, I would like to go back to a certain point in time in my life where I was more mentally stable and had the energy to live. That's recovery for me at this point of my life.
I'm doing the same. Taking a day by day.
 
LifeSucksDenWeDie

LifeSucksDenWeDie

I hate myself because of what I am not.
Apr 19, 2022
1,238
I don't think that recovery is possible and I don't want it (for me).
 
author

author

they/them
Jul 13, 2021
53
I think recovery is possible, but not possible for me.
 
Hirokami

Hirokami

What if it were all just a dream?
Feb 21, 2021
389
I'll never be able to do a full recovery. The SI and urges to SH will always be there, even if I do manage to "recover" (just at a lower frequency). I'll always be at-risk, given how I've had this mindset and behavior for so long. Maybe my version of recovery is just a giant cope for the rest of my life, hoping that nothing sets me off.
 
WaterHemlock

WaterHemlock

Student
Dec 18, 2019
113
I had hope for a long time. I did try and fail and try again.
But I've only now realized what everyone else probably already knew. I'm a weird person who makes other people uncomfortable. And no amount of willpower is ever going to change that. And no amount of effort is ever going to make another person love me.
The only people that want to be around me want something.
It would take a miracle to make my life worth living now.
And stupid me, I'm still hoping for a miracle even as I'm preparing for death.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: LittleJem