Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
as suicidal.

I knew that they would be on my mind while standing on the bridge and it would make jumping extremely difficult.

I may not be able to afford rent in 2 weeks so in that case I will ctb even though it would affect them. I won’t do it to punish them or anything like that. It would be because living in my car is not happening.

I’m upset about having to live but I’ve temporarily gained a “fuck you world” kind of strength that will most likely disappear by the end of the week. I did notice while walking in the park last night how unreal reality felt. I dont think jumping would be very hard. The only place that seems real is the inside of my apartment.
 
not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Illuminated
Mar 23, 2018
3,722
So they didn't say anything ? Or ask questions ?
I will not be able to say anything or the would try to stop me or have me locked up.
 
Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
So they didn't say anything ? Or ask questions ?
I will not be able to say anything or the would try to stop me or have me locked up.
The thing is they’re very aware of all my issues. They were very sad and told me how it would shatter all those in our family. They gave me some ideas on how to improve things that I’m willing to do (find a new therapist, join a young adult group at a church). If my life continues to spiral despite trying their suggestions then I don’t know.

I explained that a hospital would be pointless because it’s only 72 hours. It wouldn’t change anything
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,528
The thing is they’re very aware of all my issues. They were very sad and told me how it would shatter all those in our family. They gave me some ideas on how to improve things that I’m willing to do (find a new therapist, join a young adult group at a church). If my life continues to spiral despite trying their suggestions then I don’t know.

I explained that a hospital would be pointless because it’s only 72 hours. It wouldn’t change anything
What country do you live in if that's alright to ask?
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Illuminated
Mar 23, 2018
3,722
The thing is they’re very aware of all my issues. They were very sad and told me how it would shatter all those in our family. They gave me some ideas on how to improve things that I’m willing to do (find a new therapist, join a young adult group at a church). If my life continues to spiral despite trying their suggestions then I don’t know.

I explained that a hospital would be pointless because it’s only 72 hours. It wouldn’t change anything


I wish you the best … if a new therapist or church will help that is great. I know for me however I do want to exit.
Even if I went to a therapist it won't change my mind. I used to be religious. Not really a church person but I did listen to religious music & prayed. (Family is religious and go to church every week) I still pray for my family & friends and also for god to let me exit.
I guess I still believe there is a god … his followers … not so much. Especially when I see the way his followers treat other people.
 
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