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throwaway123

throwaway123

Hell0
Aug 5, 2018
1,445
I fucking failed. 4 out of 10 points. Luckily it was just an online test so I wasn't publicly humiliated. I feel like a failure and I am. I can't even do that simple task. I don't want to be stuck in my parents apartment forever. I can't get a job and I can't think. My brain is useless and I'm worthless. I'll be stuck here until I CTB somehow.
 
azucaramargo

azucaramargo

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2018
1,010
I fucking failed. 4 out of 10 points. Luckily it was just an online test so I wasn't publicly humiliated. I feel like a failure and I am. I can't even do that simple task. I don't want to be stuck in my parents apartment forever. I can't get a job and I can't think. My brain is useless and I'm worthless. I'll be stuck here until I CTB somehow.

I feel like I'm in the same boat as you. Living with parents is extremely difficult. I also took these online tests for a temp agency to assess my proficiency in MS Office programs (e.g., Excel, Word, Outlook). The test link froze mid-way through my attempt, and I haven't been able to re-take them, and I felt wholly worthless on that day when I had started them, and was unable to finish. I wrote to IBM, to the temp agency, but I have gotten nowhere. I guess I could try harder to have the temp agency re-send the test to me, but I don't have the will.

Joblessness is so difficult. I hate it. I experience the same feelings you do about not being able to think. One thing my parents have done/said to make me feel better is to emphasize that this time is for me to focus on getting better (health-wise). That really does not help, but on some of my better days, I try to think of it like that. I want you to know I'm with you. Living with my parents in their small place. It's very difficult and I want to die everyday. Let's help each other if we can. I know we are both too good to die so soon.