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Apr 10, 2018
As the title states I turn 20 years old today. I think it obvious I didn't plan to live this long. I wish I made a backup plan rather than just hoping to die. Every birthday I wonder if I'll be able to last another year. Will I make it to 21, I dont know.

I'm find myself wishing that I didn't waste my teen years. I wish I had tried harder and made plans for the future. Now it feels like I'm so far behind most people. It feels like I never developed into an actual person because of my mental problems. I might as well be that same 14 year old kid who's afraid of everything.

Well, I just hope my 20s aren't completely wasted.
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Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
Being in your 20's you haven't wasted as much time as you think/feel. I've been wishing not to see another birthday of myself for 15 or so years. I'm in my early thirty's now. I guess for most people "real life" starts at your 20's ... Job,car,partner,house etc. There's plenty of time still to build a life when you just turned 20.

Happy birthday by the way. I know it's not "happy" for you but i don't know another way of saying it.
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