Rip in piss
- Jan 10, 2022
A Moomins fan. Nice. I can also relate to that perpetual back and forth between wanting to live and wanting to die.wanted to introduce myself before i post anymore, it feels strange but here i am :^)
i'm soon turning 21 and have actively wanted to ctb for almost half of my life now. i have self harmed for just as long, and it is all because of chronic trauma beginning in childhood which i just can't seem to escape from. i lost almost all of my friends (and continue to destroy my remaining relationships) because of my self injurious, impulsive actions, as well as the way i behave when i'm feeling worthless/shitty/irritated, which is most of the time. i'm in between wanting desperately to recover and wanting desperately to take myself away from this world which has nothing left for me.
being able to find out exactly what i need for a peaceful journey away from this horrid existence makes me feel calmer. i'm very grateful for this forum even though i am a very new member. even lurking at the time made me feel less alone.