• Hey Visitor,

    In light of recent events, all community members in the US should reach out to their representative in regards to the Stop Online Suicide Assistance Forums Act that has been introduced in congress. This bill, if passed, could criminalize this community and hold it liable for simply hosting information.

    You should be able to locate and contact your represenative by going to this website. You can also contact Lori Trahan, the one spearheading this bill by calling her office at (202) 225-3411 or by leaving a message on the contact form on her site.

    One of the best ways to combat this is to make your voice heard. We're not political activists, but we made this notice to let you know that you do have a voice and that you do have representives that represent you in congress.
Asatsuyu

Asatsuyu

Local goblin
Jun 26, 2022
18
Hello! I’m a 25 year old woman from Europe, I have always had a somewhat bleak outlook on life and always kinda assumed I’d end up catching the bus, just didn’t know when. But in the past few months I’ve started to feel ready

Other than I’m a cheery bubbly person and I love making people laugh and smile, so I’m always happy to meet new people! Nice to meet you all!
 
_smile_

_smile_

someone love me.
Jun 26, 2022
22
Hi! I’m new here. 31 year old female from Chicago. I feel like I’ve been looking for something like this for years. 💜
I’m unhappy. Like, no matter how much money I make, where I go, who I’m with, I’m unhappy. In the moment, you’d have no idea; I put on a great front. I have fun and am social in the short term, but the big picture, the one that keeps us waking up each day, I am broken. And I hate myself. I hate myself for how I look and how I feel. For not being able to just be happy…
 
el4ine

el4ine

Member
Feb 27, 2022
5
Hi everyone,

My name is Soren and I am 20 (will be 21 in October). I have dealt with depression and self-harm since 6th grade (so I guess about 12 years old?) I have been diagnosed with ADHD and BPD, apparently bipolar runs in the family so I am unsure if that's in the fucked up mix. I was abused and neglected emotionally, and sexually when I was young and dealt with repetitive sexual and physical abuse over the last few years in my romantic relationships. I have a loving boyfriend, and my younger brother and I are very close. I have immense guilt about truly contemplating CTB because of them, but it is still an option. I have thought about it for years, ever since I started experiencing psychosis at age 16. I feel alone and ashamed of my feelings, and how my years of cutting, as well as being on medication constantly have affected the people in my life. I came on here to find other people like me, and from what I have seen so far I already feel accepted. It helps to know I am not alone. Anyways, I am very friendly and I try to stay fairly active on here, despite being new. I hope everyone had an okay day, and if not, that you can at least come on here to know that you have a safe place to talk.
Hello! I’m a 25 year old woman from Europe, I have always had a somewhat bleak outlook on life and always kinda assumed I’d end up catching the bus, just didn’t know when. But in the past few months I’ve started to feel ready

Other than I’m a cheery bubbly person and I love making people laugh and smile, so I’m always happy to meet new people! Nice to meet you all!
hello! it's nice to meet you too!!
 
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K

Klophy

Student
Jun 28, 2022
154
Hey, i'm almost 30. I dealt with abuse and bullying while i was younger. Led me to develop anxiety, depression and stress eating + maladaptive daydreaming to cope. All of which increased the bullying. Adopted a fake it till you make it approach which lasted until the end of the first year of Uni, had a breakdown and i've been a NEET since. I was content to waste away, losing myself in whatever until i died.


Now i'm here, lost interest in everything, in debt, anxiety and panic attacks keep me up for the majority of the day. Nothing but overthinking and negative thoughts. I've started to try and 'live' life but i feel like it's too late and i'm just fed up with it all.

This seems more like a rant than a introduction.
 
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C

ConstantPain

Sorry but cats are so much better than people
Jun 9, 2022
169
hi!! i've been lurking here for a few months, but i was too nervous to actually make an account on here until very recently. i guess i just needed a push...

call me apple, i guess. i'm 21 years old and currently residing in florida (god help me). i've been struggling with physical and especially mental health problems pretty much my whole life, and they've only gotten worse with time. they are pretty much completely unbearable! they make living a total fucking chore. it genuinely feels like my body is a fucking torture chamber. i refuse to rot away in a nursing home 60 years from now, and i'm not the least sorry about that. i've had a plan to ctb for a while now, but it's never come to fruition. hopefully someday it will, though...!

please use it/its pronouns when referring to me!!! long story short, those are just the pronouns i'm most comfortable with. (i'm amab, if you're wondering.)

see you around!
Hello Apple!
I just saw your post and totally relate to your Florida comment, and most of the rest too. If you'd like to simply commiserate sometime on our F'd up state I'm here for it.
I'm old, 45! 😒 she/her
 
S

song321

New Member
Jun 8, 2022
1
Hi 21(turning 22 soon) years old from Canada. This is my first time ever posting on a forum site so I'm pretty nervous haha. I've been struggling with suicidal thoughts since high school and started self harm when I was around 13. I don't have any long term plans in life and I see any future for myself where I wouldn't be miserable. I guess the only thing stopping me from ending it all right now is the damn guilt of it.

Anyways hello.
 
A

ave

New Member
Jul 5, 2022
1
Hello! I’m a 25 year old woman from Europe, I have always had a somewhat bleak outlook on life and always kinda assumed I’d end up catching the bus, just didn’t know when. But in the past few months I’ve started to feel ready

Other than I’m a cheery bubbly person and I love making people laugh and smile, so I’m always happy to meet new people! Nice to meet you all!
Glad to meet another person from Europe
 
  • Hugs
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stefanmentalcel

stefanmentalcel

Loser
Jul 3, 2022
14
Hello!
I've been on this forum for 2 years (my nickname was 'grungeCat'). I decided to delete my account a few months ago but I'm back!
For those who don't know me :
I'm 22 years old, demipansexual male. I was born in Poland but I emmigrated to Norway. I love cats, trains and computers. I suffer from autism, severe depression, OCD and probably ADHD and alcohol addiction. I tried to commit suicide 6 times so far... I love this forum and I met a lot of wonderful people there. I'm pro-choice, politically I'm a leftist and I'm LGBTQIA+ enjoyer.
 
K

keitaro

uwu
Jul 10, 2022
514
hello everyone. i think it's wonderful that this site exists. it's nice that we can talk about this without judgment and decide for ourselves what the right path to take is.
i'm researching methods right now. my current thought is that i would just like to have a method ready so that i can carry it out when i want to. but first i want to make peace with leaving this life so that nothing will have a hold of me. who knows when that will be.
i hope everyone can achieve what they truly desire in their hearts.
best wishes.
 
7angels

7angels

Member
Jul 14, 2022
46
hello. i am 7angels. i searched for this website to find out how to escape my troubled life. i’ve been hitting road block after road block these days.

im 19, i live in nyc. i like ambient music, eurodance, pokemon, my little pony.
 
mediocre.marsupial

mediocre.marsupial

Member
Jul 15, 2022
14
Hi. I've been looking for a site like this for a long while now. I have no paths to go down in my life at a time where everybody else my age is at the crossroads. From when I was born autistic my life was set on a dead-end road.
 
Againstthewind

Againstthewind

Member
Jul 10, 2022
63
Forgot to post here after all this time!

Late twenties/UK, very very exhausted with life after multiple traumas, I think I have experienced every emotion from PTSD to panic to Depression, now I feel I am just a former shell of myself. Looking to CTB asap, but I am also a meticulous planner, so it has to be right. I am alone in the world, which has its benefits I guess, that no one can find me. This forum provides me with an outlook to release my feelings with out being slapped with a label of 'cRaZy' or 'gEt HeLp'. Dont even get me started on Mental Health services, ugh, hate them with a passion, they are the ones letting people down then suicide ever could.
Welcome!
 
KQuotientW

KQuotientW

404: Reason to live not found
Jul 17, 2022
326
I'm 49 years old. I seem to be a magnet for creeps and narcissistic abusers. I'm quiet and mostly keep to myself, but do have a few friends. I don't go looking for trouble, but troublesome people seem to find their way toward me. I've been in and out of court because I have a stalker and LEOs do nothing about him. Plus, I have a genetic, degenerative disability that's just getting too much now. I live with chronic pain and conditions. Catching the bus will be like going home.
 
sufferingalways

sufferingalways

Avoiding flashing images, epilepsy.
Apr 26, 2020
547
Hello! I’m a 25 year old woman from Europe, I have always had a somewhat bleak outlook on life and always kinda assumed I’d end up catching the bus, just didn’t know when. But in the past few months I’ve started to feel ready

Other than I’m a cheery bubbly person and I love making people laugh and smile, so I’m always happy to meet new people! Nice to meet you all!

Hello nice to “meet” you too, Im a 35+ Female in England. I like making people laugh too. I write silly jokes sometimes. Sometimes they’re funny.
I'm 49 years old. I seem to be a magnet for creeps and narcissistic abusers. I'm quiet and mostly keep to myself, but do have a few friends. I don't go looking for trouble, but troublesome people seem to find their way toward me. I've been in and out of court because I have a stalker and LEOs do nothing about him. Plus, I have a genetic, degenerative disability that's just getting too much now. I live with chronic pain and conditions. Catching the bus will be like going home.

hello, sorry to hear that you’re going through such hellish experiences. 🤗🤗 hugs
Forgot to post here after all this time!

Late twenties/UK, very very exhausted with life after multiple traumas, I think I have experienced every emotion from PTSD to panic to Depression, now I feel I am just a former shell of myself. Looking to CTB asap, but I am also a meticulous planner, so it has to be right. I am alone in the world, which has its benefits I guess, that no one can find me. This forum provides me with an outlook to release my feelings with out being slapped with a label of 'cRaZy' or 'gEt HeLp'. Dont even get me started on Mental Health services, ugh, hate them with a passion, they are the ones letting people down then suicide ever could.
Welcome!

Hello, i agree eith you on the mental health services, bgbest load of tossers u e had misfortune to know (and get kicked off the service i needed - by libelous care coordinator. Ill have my day in coirt, so i feel your pains. Complex ptsd here too.
Shitty circumstances that we try best to cope, but as a song by Duran Duran seems to fit mine, Falling Down.

If you want to talk, ruminate etc my message box is open. Im not on every day but i will reply. 🤗
Hiya. I'm just here, I guess.

I love pets, gaming, reading/writing, and other things. Nice to meet all of you! :)
Hello i love writing too. What sorts of things do you write?

mines poems, (a film script- film made is at you tube)
Scripts, a book in progress, lots of bitty things.

🌷🌷
 
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joeythinks

joeythinks

Member
Jul 3, 2022
5
I can't remember exactly how or when I found this place, but I've been lurking for a while and recently signed up. Reading through threads has been cathartic for me, but now - actually posting - I'm struck by the reality of the state of my mental health.

I have a long history of mental health issues in my family. Both my father and paternal grandfather took their own lives. My mother, a person I've never known, had her own issues... While I know it's not true, I still feel like my story has been written for me, you know?

I'm a British man in his early 30s. I don't feel tip-top, but knowing there are others who feel similarly to me does help. Misery loves company eh!

I'm going to go back to lurking for now, but perhaps I'll start to post regularly. Maybe I'll see you in the comments of another thread sometime.
 
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T

The Best Vacuum

Member
Jul 23, 2022
11
I kinda found this place through an old partner and her mentions of CTB. Funny that I'm here after all that but it happens I suppose.
I'm a 26 year old woman in the US and I like this place because it doesn't have some gross emphasis on trying to save people.
 
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mugiusagi

mugiusagi

One step at a time
Jul 19, 2022
9
I am 20 yo m.
I am involved in some communities completely unrelated to this forum, but I like the vibe of no judgement here.
I support lgbt because I’m bi and enjoy anime.
I Try to cheer myself and the people that support me.
 
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L

Lone Wanderer

-
Jul 28, 2022
106
Pleasure to meet you guys.

New around here but not much to say about myself since time is short for me so no point for a proper introduction. However, I just wanted to say it’s nice to be surrounded by other people going down the same path. There’s some comfort in that at least.
 
Jrmull1993

Jrmull1993

Warlock
Jul 13, 2022
778
Hey everyone I'm John.

Came across this forum while reading up on Sodium Azide, and I'm glad I found this, seems like a great group of people.

I'm 29, live in one of the five boroughs of NYC, and have 73 days left until I exit this world early. Feel free to PM me at any time if your interested in any specifics.

I'm looking forward to being a part of this community for the bit of time I have left.
 
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D

damaged_soul

Student
Jul 30, 2022
121
Hi everyone, I'm so, so glad that I've found this site. I filled out my member application yesterday and was stressed about whether it was going to be approved. I was absolutely overjoyed when it was! (You know you have a sad life when your greatest achievement is getting accepted into a suicide forum loll). I've only been on here for one day now yet it feels like home. I feel much less lonely. Just yesterday I was crying from loneliness but I feel much better now knowing I have a place where I'm understood. A few months ago I tried to ctb. Unfortunately I didn't know about this site, so I didn't have access to high-quality information or support. So despite my greatest efforts (I spent 40+ hrs researching my chosen method by reading medical journal articles and created a detailed plan), I failed. In hindsight, I really wish I had known about this site earlier, it could have saved me so much pain and stress. But better late than never! I'm excited to finally be able to talk to people who understand and I hope to ctb with N soon. After my attempt failed, I had been planning to travel to Latin America to try to find N in person because I didn't know it could be purchased online. If I didn't find out about this forum, I probably would have ended up wasting a lot of money and putting myself in great danger!
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Angelic
Mar 23, 2018
4,521
Just a reminder...
Don't post too much personal information.

1.) Name
2.) Location (Not too specific anyway, L.E. and pro-lifers are on here) If had not already I wouldn't have even posted
the country I'm from.
3.) Personal pics (They can be doxed) It's happened before.
4.) Ordering and receiving dates (If you choose to order anything online)
5.) Beware of scammers.... There's a sticky thread about this.

It has been awhile since I have been in this thread, I guess I've been busy with the other threads.
Most members are kind on here but like the rest of the internet.... Some aren't. I don't think it's as bad as most places though.
 
S

suicidalwillreturn

Member
Aug 2, 2022
93
Hi, I'm Emmanuel
I'm from Asia, so I'm using ESL, apologies for my grammar.
23 Male
I don't know if I even have any mental disorders since I'm not diagnosed and I don't want to self-diagnose.
Can't go to a mental health professional because of financial constraints and also due to doubt but majority because of financial constraints.
I'm your typical stereotype, I loved video games, mostly PC since we can't afford consoles. Always asked for them but my parents didn't spoil me (that's what my parents always say). Well, I disagree with that statement because I never learned a life skill because they never let me do any house chores. I had a nanny all my life when we were financially stable. My dad died when I was 16, and I was left with a loving mom. I had friends when I was in elementary and high school but never really maintained them outside school. As what I've searched, their is a term for that, they said it's friends out of convenience. Overweight my whole life but now I'm started to somewhat exercise and I'm slimming down. But I also think skipping meals may be a factor to that. There's a lot of things I like to share but I think this is starting to get long. Always had the ideation since I was in high school but it was more of 99% joke and 1% real but now after I graduate and self-reflect, the suicidal thoughts seems too real now. I think I'm slowly losing everything. I think it's just a matter of time and if I would truly hit rock bottom, who knows? Does God know? I don't know
 
not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Angelic
Mar 23, 2018
4,521
Hi, I'm  xxxxxxxx
I'm from Asia, so I'm using ESL, apologies for my grammar.

I don't know if I even have any mental disorders since I'm not diagnosed and I don't want to self-diagnose.
Can't go to a mental health professional because of financial constraints and also due to doubt but majority because of financial constraints.
I'm your typical stereotype, I loved video games, mostly PC since we can't afford consoles. Always asked for them but my parents didn't spoil me (that's what my parents always say). Well, I disagree with that statement because I never learned a life skill because they never let me do any house chores. I had a nanny all my life when we were financially stable. My dad died when I was 16, and I was left with a loving mom. I had friends when I was in elementary and high school but never really maintained them outside school. As what I've searched, their is a term for that, they said it's friends out of convenience. Overweight my whole life but now I'm started to somewhat exercise and I'm slimming down. But I also think skipping meals may be a factor to that. There's a lot of things I like to share but I think this is starting to get long. Always had the ideation since I was in high school but it was more of 99% joke and 1% real but now after I graduate and self-reflect, the suicidal thoughts seems too real now. I think I'm slowly losing everything. I think it's just a matter of time and if I would truly hit rock bottom, who knows? Does God know? I don't know
Just wanted to say welcome to S.S.
Sorry that circumstances brought you here. Just be careful what personal information you post.
There is L.E. & Prolifers on here.
(See above post)
I also removed your name from my reply so it doesn't stay there.