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Trashcan

Trashcan

Trash
Aug 31, 2018
1,234
A lot of users seem to have bad families. My family isn’t bad. Especially not my parents. They couldn’t have been more loving. They couldn’t have been better parents. But for some reason, I still ended up this way... not their fault at all. I would’ve been screwed if I had some of my friends parents (well, more screwed than I am). There’s one in particular that I think I would’ve ended up homeless if I had them as parents.

Does anyone else on here have good parents?
 
M

millefeui

-
Mar 31, 2018
1,036
My "father" hasn't talked to me in years, since I was 16 or so. He was never the caring type, but it got worse with time. My mother is just weird. We don't talk a lot, only when necessary, because we pretty much never agree on anything.

I do have a close relationship with an aunt, though. I consider her my true mother. And father. She is almost 70s, and boy it kills me inside knowing the pain I will cause on her when I kill myself.
 
Sayo

Sayo

Not 2B
Aug 22, 2018
520
My mother, yes. I'm more close to her than anyone on earth except my partner. I'm estranged from my father; I've thought about reconnecting, but I think it's just the nostalgia speaking, as he was violent.

I think there are things my mother didn't do perfectly - we have an inverted parent-child dynamic and individuation was a disaster -, but I do think most people would have caused me substantial pain at some point. Like you, I can definitely think of people I know whose parents would have just left me with no hope at all. Without meaning to be, I was a difficult child. It's not like genetics or the traumatic environment helped, but I don't think even more prepared parents would have known what to do about a lot of it. Very neurotic from an early age and utterly beyond most discipline. I just decided to be a different person when I was ten because of books and an existential crisis. And it seems that society at large is not really equipped to deal with the kinds of issues I have, so it feels wrong to blame my mother. If she knew what to do, she would do it. If I knew what she should do any more, I would get her to do it.

I have trouble feeling my mother's affection because of my childhood, but the evidence of it is very real. And she tried more than I saw anyone else try and suffered a lot because of it. Not wanting to hurt my mother and my brother motivated me to keep going through treatment for a long time.
 
worldexploder

worldexploder

-
Sep 19, 2018
2,823
I never felt close to my parents. Especislly my abusive mother. I only felt close to my grandparents (dads side) and my aunt. My grandpa died in 95 and my grandma in 2010.

As of 2018, I am only close to my aunt and ex wife.
 
throwaway777

throwaway777

一人、部屋で、独り。
Oct 3, 2018
641
my parents care about me … they did a lot of sacrifices for me … and i love them … but it's so complex … they cant understand me … i love them but i feel so alone ...i suffer and i want to die ...but when i think about them, i feel so guilty that i end up hating myself even more and thinking that that's one more reason to die ...they dont deserve a weak daughter like me ));
 
Lost1234

Lost1234

Xentos
Jun 20, 2018
63
Well, I'd like to say I have good parents. My Dad was the type that didn't believe in depression even though He was clearly Clinically depressed . left the house when I was 14, a year after my sister ctb..... We don't talk , don't even know where he is , Even after all these years. My mom on the other hand is a very caring person, She's hurt with everything that's been happening , so I try not to reveal this side of me. well, at least I tried until months ago , when I finally decided to ctb the CO way ..... despite the thoroughly planned attempt , I was pulled out unconscious by her ... and I haven't spoken anything till now because I don't know what to say.

So, yeah .... I have good parents, just an unlucky turn of events.
 
Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Super duper enlightened
Sep 9, 2018
1,699
Yeah, the funny thing is I'm close with my parents these days, even though I'm in the US, my dad is in Europe, and my mum in Australia. We talk on Skype a lot, and have a much better relationship than when I was younger and we all lived together. It takes maturity and distance for these things to work out in many cases.
 
oldgray

oldgray

i wish i'd melt with the snow
Oct 19, 2018
82
i live with them but we are not close, i see them more as flatmates than anything else.
they aren't the best and they aren't the worst, we never developed a relationship when it was the time and now i just don't care about my family in general.
 
Tara2018

Tara2018

Member
Oct 17, 2018
69
I thought I was close to my father until he committed suicide 3,5 years ago.
My mother thinks we are close but I’m constantly living to her about everything.
 
BaconCheeseburger

BaconCheeseburger

Comfort-eating
Aug 4, 2018
689
I live with mine. We bicker because the generation gap means we disagree on most things. We do get on sometimes though.

They'll be sad when I go..
 
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Fcancer

Fcancer

Student
Sep 24, 2018
184
I was extremely close with my mother(although she only knew the loving son me), but she died after a short battle with cancer in '14 when I also had cancer the first time the same year. My dad is an amazing man, but he is a carbon copy of me very reserved and doesn't talk a lot so communicaton can be and has always been hard for both of us. He is almost 70 and I fear my ctb will put him in an early grave, but I don't know what else to do.
 
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Maravillosa

Maravillosa

Mistress of all she surveys
Sep 7, 2018
638
I am very close to my mother, with whom I live: it is quite distressing to see her bedridden, unable to stand or walk, and with a failing memory. She needs me, and I dare not ctb while she is alive.

I had been fairly close to my father before he molested me when I was 17 (and he was very drunk), but after that I refused to be in the same room alone with him. After my father left my mother, I did not see my father again or speak to him on the telephone, but I did write letters to him a couple of times a month, and he wrote back to me. He died in 2014.
 
C

CJM

Experienced
Jul 13, 2018
246
I'm close with mine, especially my Dad who passed away this year, he was a hardworking good man and a friend, taken by fucking cancer.
Definitely miss the little things like going over to see him, catching up for a beer and watching sports.

Watching him suffer that last week before death with no option of letting us give him the chance to have a sleep will always piss me off.
 
littlelungs

littlelungs

Arcanist
Oct 21, 2018
492
My relationship with my parents is kinda weird. They divorced when I was younger (I'm glad they did; they hated each other at the end), so I'm sure my relationship with them would have been way different than it actually is now.

My mom and I fought like fuck from basically the time I could talk until I was about 16, and now we get along just fine. The older I get the more alike we are, which is bittersweet as we're both emotionally unstable and impulsive with a past full of suicidal behaviour... but we're also very loyal and have a heart of gold. My mom's actually a huge reason as to why I haven't ctb yet; I know that she loves me with everything in her and I'm terrified of hurting her... so this is a massive fucking barrier.

I have a more complicated relationship with my dad. When I was growing up, we were very close and he always had my back. Now, as an adult, it's just weird. There have been times where he's told me to just kill myself already, and then there have been other times where he's called me up just to say he loves me... it almost feels like a game of tug-of-war. I think that between all of my mental/emotional issues and hospitalizations, the fact that I still don't have my undergraduate degree, etc. he's just sick of my shit, and I can't say I blame him. I'm 10000% sick of my shit, too.

This is an interesting topic, Trashcan. :) It made me ramble a bit, but it also made me think.