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NumbItAll

NumbItAll

Waiting for the bus...
Joined
May 20, 2018
Messages
350
I completed another orbit and it's just a harsh reminder of how miserable, meaningless, and disappointing my life has been so far. I'm at an age now where I can't just cling to the illusion of "potential" anymore; what you see is what you get, and there's just not much there. I haven't done a whole lot of fulfilling things and have nothing to look forward to. I feel completely dead inside while my slowly decaying body catches up. I am mourning a pitiful existence which will no doubt end in severe loneliness and sadness.
 
MYStERY_Man

MYStERY_Man

The 't' is silent
Joined
Jul 15, 2020
Messages
227
Happy birthday! If nothing else, the bus is one orbit closer.

I'm currently on the path of abdicating "potential" to do what I want. Uncle/mom think I should be a judge, dad thinks I should be a prosecutor. I'm pretty sure if I repeated last year for 3 or 4 extra ones I could be either. But fuck that, no more. Not their life to die, not their life to live.
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Joined
Mar 22, 2020
Messages
7,347
Sorry you're feeling like this.
I dunno if this will help but, I became a NEET at my 30s for three years and now, just now, I've managed to have a kinda normal life again.

Hope things can better somehow.

Hugs,

Matt
 
Celerity

Celerity

Enlightened
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,454
Out of curiosity, how old are you?
 
NumbItAll

NumbItAll

Waiting for the bus...
Joined
May 20, 2018
Messages
350
Celerity said:
Out of curiosity, how old are you?
Late 20s, which of course is not very old, but it feels like it in the context of having done nothing. It's like I haven't even started life yet and I'm already exiting prime years...

And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

WornOutLife said:
Sorry you're feeling like this.
I dunno if this will help but, I became a NEET at my 30s for three years and now, just now, I've managed to have a kinda normal life again.

Hope things can better somehow.

Hugs,

Matt
That actually does help a little. There probably is a path forward, and anything can happen, but sometimes the emotional side of it becomes overwhelming, and mental breakdowns like this one occur.
 
Celerity

Celerity

Enlightened
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,454
NumbItAll said:
Late 20s, which of course is not very old, but it feels like it in the context of having done nothing. It's like I haven't even started life yet and I'm already exiting prime years...




That actually does help a little. There probably is a path forward, and anything can happen, but sometimes the emotional side of it becomes overwhelming, and mental breakdowns like this one occur.
I’m 28 and feel your pain. I severely misused my 20s. I’ve seen people who did much worse with the “best years of one’s life”, but realizing that doesn’t really make me feel better.

If teenage me could have known where her life would go, she would have stepped out in front of a bus.
 

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