AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
how much do you drink in order to get ''high'' ? Right now I drank 15% of a brandy bottle almost finished, another 15% from a new brandy bottle, and half from a vodka bottle but I still don't feel anything. I want to be as numb as possile on my last night ever. Any ideas?
 
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rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
Please don't do anything rash. I understand you're suffering. It is very very hard.
 
AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
Please don't do anything rash. I understand you're suffering. It is very very hard.
just wanna get as numb as possible 24h before I ctb. im cursed even on this side.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
just wanna get as numb as possible 24h before I ctb. im cursed even on this side.
I get it. I can see from the posts you've made recently you are really suffering. So am I for different reasons. I remind myself that rushing into something is likely to make things worse. I wish I could help.
 
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AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
I get it. I can see from the posts you've made recently you are really suffering. So am I for different reasons. I remind myself that rushing into something is likely to make things worse. I wish I could help.
id call it more out of desperation which i dont always find a bad thing. when you have nothing more to lose... you take any risk.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
Sadly things can often become even worse due to taking a risk when you are desperate. I may be entirely wrong. Please forgive me if I am but your posts in other threads lead me to believe you would like to find somebody to be with. So it seems you may not have entirely given up on things. I hope you can feel better tomorrow.
 
AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
Sadly things can often become even worse due to taking a risk when you are desperate. I may be entirely wrong. Please forgive me if I am but your posts in other threads lead me to believe you would like to find somebody to be with. So it seems you may not have entirely given up on things. I hope you can feel better tomorrow.
Tomorrow is my D-day , again for differet reasons than i openly stated before, so id like to get as numb as possible for the last time ever. i dont care if i fail. im really desperate to get rid of everything.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
Tomorrow is my D-day , again for differet reasons than i openly stated before, so id like to get as numb as possible for the last time ever. i dont care if i fail. im really desperate to get rid of everything.
Sorry you're in this position. It shouldn't happen to anyone.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
it's happenig right there to me so i guess i just have to... end it all?
You are asking the question. Do you have to? So soon? I would guess you could take some time to consider things calmly. See how you are tomorrow. Maybe chat with people on here that you get on with. Take care
 
AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
You are asking the question. Do you have to? So soon? I would guess you could take some time to consider things calmly. See how you are tomorrow. Maybe chat with people on here that you get on with. Take care
i've had it all. what happened today (outside of forum obviously) was my last straw. my only way is to end ti all. take care as well;.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
i've had it all. what happened today (outside of forum obviously) was my last straw. my only way is to end ti all. take care as well;.
I understand desperation. Please don't rush into anything. Don't end up in a worse position. I think there are quite a few people on here who like you and wish you well. Sorry about today. Although I don't know what happened.
 
AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
I understand desperation. Please don't rush into anything. Don't end up in a worse position. I think there are quite a few people on here who like you and wish you well. Sorry about today. Although I don't know what happened.
i'm really desperate to end it all no matter what. i want to have among my last few nights completely numb. too sad i have to drink like 12 hours or more in order for me to get niumb.
 
R

rationaltake

Specialist
Sep 28, 2021
390
i'm really desperate to end it all no matter what. i want to have among my last few nights completely numb. too sad i have to drink like 12 hours or more in order for me to get niumb.
Could you try to sleep?
 
AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
Thanks but things are not going well for me either. I'm just not making a rushed decision. I'm in a living hell which never ends.
i hope things get better for yyou no matter whatl. i hate that we have to suffer likethis.
 
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N

netrezven

Arcanist
Dec 13, 2018
478
now, almost half a botthe of wine - just warmed up. If i dring all night and move and dance - can have half a bottle, no problem. But beeing drunk and standing still - very very bad after the 3rd big jack.
Well that summer got 10 shots from these german ones, jagemeister and so on..., with some jack, and rom. That destroyed me. I was talking to strangers that i'm a gangster in GTA and a famous youtube influencer :) then they wanted to make pictures of me. They said they gonna send them to a friend, and i was so drunk, mistaken their friend's name for someone famous, that can know me. So had to hide for a while. Even very drung i'm still afraid of beening photo taken, so survival tests are still passed. It happend a few times during the years to solve problems comming out while very drunk, like someone braking knies around, when kids try to play mortal combat around, still can behaive.
Still very embarassing, but worth every bottle :) It's insane cause those moments are the ones that i remember, doing crazy, everything else goes to recycle bin.
Once we couldn't drik the entire bottle so we took it out walking, we met some girls doing the same, and a friend of mine got his date. While he complained that was his first club night going home alone. Well, he didn't, cause we did not drink it all :)
 
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R

RazzleDazzle

The void stares back.
Sep 16, 2021
140
I'm a sober alcoholic. There is a point some people reach where alcohol stops working and no matter how much you drink you can't get drunk. It's something that I've experienced, it's kinda scary.
 
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AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
I'm a sober alcoholic. There is a point some people reach where alcohol stops working and no matter how much you drink you can't get drunk. It's something that I've experienced, it's kinda scary.
This is happening to me these days and I fucking hate it, cause I need to get numb like never before. Yet when I need it the most... Life.
 
R

RazzleDazzle

The void stares back.
Sep 16, 2021
140
This is happening to me these days and I fucking hate it, cause I need to get numb like never before. Yet when I need it the most... Life.

Yeah, unfortunately once it starts happening, you can't really go back to the way things used to be. I recently relapsed after three years sober and no dice, it just doesn't work for me anymore.

Pretty much the only reason why I haven't killed myself already is AA. It's a good place to go and talk about shit and get some hugs. And there's so many people in recovery who have experienced suicidal ideation themselves, it's something that's pretty normal to talk about with other alcoholics. A guy was talking in a meeting the other day about how he used to drive home and think about what he could crash into going 100mph to make his suicide look like an accident. There were nods of recognition around the room. Alcoholics get it. If I didn't have AA I would be dead, and not through drinking.
 
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AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
Yeah, unfortunately once it starts happening, you can't really go back to the way things used to be. I recently relapsed after three years sober and no dice, it just doesn't work for me anymore.

Pretty much the only reason why I haven't killed myself already is AA. It's a good place to go and talk about shit and get some hugs. And there's so many people in recovery who have experienced suicidal ideation themselves, it's something that's pretty normal to talk about with other alcoholics. A guy was talking in a meeting the other day about how he used to drive home and think about what he could crash into going 100mph to make his suicide look like an accident. There were nods of recognition around the room. Alcoholics get it. If I didn't have AA I would be dead, and not through drinking.
I'm sorry to hear that but I'm glad you found a group where you feel understood and that makes you feel better. Sending hugs.

I think i'm gonna pull another 12 hours of drinking and see what happens.
 
Wojaczek

Wojaczek

Bye to Everything
Oct 24, 2021
53
Only "trick" i have for you is to not eat anything before drinking but im sure even that won't help you, sorry OP.
Not being able to get drunk sounds like hell to me
 
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AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
Only "trick" i have for you is to not eat anything before drinking but im sure even that won't help you, sorry OP.
Not being able to get drunk sounds like hell to me
haven't eaten much today but still...
 
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AverageFanEnjoyer

AverageFanEnjoyer

The Real Monster
Sep 26, 2021
1,277
7 hours after and im pretty numb I think...
 

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