L

Lauralyn

Member
Sep 16, 2021
39
You think you're dying and live but have nothing to offer. Must be the devil at work, probably why I sense demons. The devil and demons were probably invented by psychotic people, they're the only ones who sense them.
 
Manaaja

Manaaja

euROPE
Sep 10, 2018
763
Please please please let the dog get surgery. Please please please fix her leg. Please please please let her stay with me. I love you dog. You are important to me. I want us to be together. I hope we can be together in afterdeath too. I love you.
 
littlelungs

littlelungs

Arcanist
Oct 21, 2018
460
I've gotten the hiccups five different times today just from positioning myself upright in bed so that I can get up for food, meds, bathroom, etc.

This happens so often. I don't know what the fuck is going on with my body to make it do that in particular, but it's annoying as shit.

There's so much water sloshing around in my stomach now because these last hiccups were particularly stubborn.

Fuck getting the hiccups.
 
Manaaja

Manaaja

euROPE
Sep 10, 2018
763
I've gotten the hiccups five different times today just from positioning myself upright in bed so that I can get up for food, meds, bathroom, etc.

This happens so often. I don't know what the fuck is going on with my body to make it do that in particular, but it's annoying as shit.

There's so much water sloshing around in my stomach now because these last hiccups were particularly stubborn.

Fuck getting the hiccups.

I've had similar problems with burps. I don't know why. Is it because I haven't moved or walked about any amount of time for days? Or is it because I sit or stand or sleep in bad positions? Is there blockage? Is it what I eat? Is it my vegetarian food? Is it extreme stress? Is it because I haven't eaten much? Or a combination of them all? I burped the whole last week so much every day non-stop that I hurt my throat.

I hope you can get rid of those hiccups. I was always told that getting scared removes them. Like getting jump-scared or something, for example, if someone yelled "Boo!" and touched your back.
 
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Seaghost

Seaghost

Student
Apr 14, 2019
181
I'm feeling wrong again and empty but that's ok say my pills to my brain. No need to worry about.
I even had a some funny hours yesterday. What a good bubble I'm living in....
Something inside of my says to myself I'm not suffering enough.

Hm...no need to be alive. I'm lost in myself.
I wanna touch a human gently...my human. Oh I'm sorry there's no one just me.
Hello void.
 
deflationary

deflationary

Fussy exister. Living in the epilogue
Mar 11, 2020
460
Bite it, you scum

(not addressed to anyone here :)))
 
Manaaja

Manaaja

euROPE
Sep 10, 2018
763
I'm too sad to talk.

I have wanted to play on VR this whole evening but I have cried so much and I can't get the headset wet.

Odd, now that dog is dead it feels she is somehow nearer in a way. She feels both farther away and nearer.

I have a slight "What does it all matter?" feeling. For whose sake I live? For what reason do I live? Why should I do anything? I went for a small walk, but I felt really lonely and uncomfortable. Walking alone is no fun.

I couldn't even see the dog before she died. I couldn't take one last pic, one last video, give last kiss, be there for her. I told my dog the last time we met (or was it the second last) that I love her. I told it both in English and my native language while hugging and giving her a kiss on her back.
 
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S

S like suicide

Mage
Apr 29, 2021
534
I feel really like a shit!I feel lost,empty,without any sense,completly alone in the dark with no light,no help...nothing!I wish I never came into the world ... my life was just a waste and a pain! A life without meaning, without love...i'm so tired of not having noone...so tired of this pain...so lost in the dark:(
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
15,566
Very cool how my diabetes medicine does such a good job at reducing my appetite that it just makes me hungrier, although I wonder whether or not I’d be even hungrier without it.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

I want to sleep for an eternity
Sep 24, 2020
6,284
I am jealous of people who can get euthanasia and those that die in their sleep. I am so done with this life. For me there is nothing to look forward to apart from death. It’s all so pointless.
 
http-410

http-410

nowhere
Sep 12, 2020
744
I cannot escape this situation - not in the conventional way. I just want my peace and quiet and no more people around me. Everything is too much, they are too much, I am too much.

edit:
Wow, if I hadn't already had breakfast... I don't know if I would have done "it" today.

Can things get any worse? I didn't expect everything to go so fast all of a sudden.

I have no idea what to do.
 
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http-410

http-410

nowhere
Sep 12, 2020
744
It's no longer just the beginning of the end, I'm in the middle of it.

It doesn't help to go out when I'm confronted with everything else everywhere.
 
Seaghost

Seaghost

Student
Apr 14, 2019
181
The loop around my neck is getting tighter and tighter.
Yes sir or madames in heaven or hell I do my best to die. You don't need to punish me cause you think I'm to slow.
I'm on my way but I need some help,cover or some kind of a wingman.
Is that allowed???

Sweet legal pills you won't help me....
 
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Ego Sum Medusa

Ego Sum Medusa

I am the Crone.
Sep 28, 2021
162
The Last of Us is one of my husband's favorite games as well (although he's not enjoying the sequel nearly as much).

I have seen bits of it, watching him play, and it is unique and interesting. I can see why a person would get caught up in it, especially here, with the specter of death looming constantly.

Although, I suppose that is a common thread among most first-person-shooter games.

It looks like fun to play and a great escape, but alas, my issues with vertigo prevent me playing such games.
 
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callme

callme

Warlock
Aug 15, 2021
728
When I visit somebody and they tell me to make myself at home, first thing I do is kick them out, because I don't like visitors.

I recently quit my job as a can crusher. It was soda pressing..
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
15,566
I watched the Animal Crossing direct and I wish I could say “too little, too late” but it’s more like “too much, too late”. I just wanted to be done with that game after I finished my island goddammit. I think I’m probably just not going to bother with it for my own sanity even though they did readd one of my favorite features from the 3DS Animal Crossing game.
 
http-410

http-410

nowhere
Sep 12, 2020
744
The urge to ctb is incredibly strong today, but I'm not yet ready. Still, I think I'm missing an opportunity.

The documents must be destroyed. The disks must be overwritten. Nothing should be left. Nothing personal, revealing. I wish I could throw this room, including myself, into a giant shredder and erase thoughts of me from everyone's mind.

I think it happened. I have disintegrated.

I always feel a little better when I manage to block everything out. But I can't do it any longer, soon™ everything will stop and I will be confronted with everything bad. I am increasingly alienating myself, maneuvering a human-like (is it?) scaffold in front of me, only to destroy it in the end.
 
foxdieΩ

foxdieΩ

Experienced
Sep 16, 2021
216
Does Google purposely make spellcheck not work on Android so I have to google words constantly? I was one letter off, how can't you catch that? Ugh probably.
 
http-410

http-410

nowhere
Sep 12, 2020
744
Why do these subreddits exist if posts are deleted?

What a waste of time and energy.
 
WOODESITY

WOODESITY

Experienced
Mar 15, 2019
209
Back to my secluded space, and back to my random thoughts, my ears occupied by earphones as they bring enjoyment as some level, my system intoxicated with alcohol, i distract myself every day to take off my mind of this life i got stuck in, thoughts and plans about killing myself will never go away unless i stop existing and that's already my desire, my mood is like randomized, it changes so quickly and then it's always instable, i want to stop existing forever, i fucking hate this existence, whoever forced me into it you haven't done anything good to me but bad, time will come when i have enough courage and i will end my life, i look forward for this day with excitement because i feel like ending all suffering permanently is rational choice.
 
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Laddydragon

Laddydragon

Member
May 16, 2021
23
I'm just not made for this world and also I'm just a bad person in general I never hurt anyone but I never say anything right can never be smart enough never good enough I'm a failure my whole existence has been pointless and as soon as I die no one will remember me and that is good I'm glad I'd rather not leave a impression on people
 
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needingpeace24

needingpeace24

Member
Oct 19, 2021
44
This is an interesting place. Reading over threads the last few days and seeing so many broken human beings...and not being able to help a single soul.

I had a good friend take his life 18 years ago. Jumped off of a parking garage late at night. He loved to sneak up there and sort through his thoughts while looking out over our city. Always wished I could have said something meaningful to him that night before he went through with it. Just something to comfort him. I've always wondered how alone he truly felt up there that night.

That's kind of how I'm feeling right now. Not trying to talk anyone down off of a ledge or anything...but if anyone reads this just know you're not alone. If you've made posts this week I've probably seen them, and I 100% feel for you. Wish like hell you all didn't feel the way you do. I know it's a small thing to your circumstances, still wanted you all to know that.
 
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