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J

justsad&done

Visionary
Joined
Nov 11, 2020
Messages
2,805
foxdie said:
Omg did you search "teamwork" in the gif thing lol. I considered those as well haha.

:heart:...perfect:heart:
 
DocNo

DocNo

whatever
Joined
Oct 30, 2020
Messages
1,528
BitterlyAlive_ said:
I'm literally so lonely that this GIF made me tear up. But I teared up watching Gattaca seeing Jude Law and Uma Thurman kiss.....aghhhhh :(
feel you. i am also starving for human touch and this feeling of intimacy.
 
J

justsad&done

Visionary
Joined
Nov 11, 2020
Messages
2,805
BitterlyAlive_ said:
Yeah :pfff: Also that one is sweet, awww.

I'm literally so lonely that this GIF made me tear up. But I teared up watching Gattaca seeing Jude Law and Uma Thurman kiss.....aghhhhh :(
 
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Sockeye Salmon

Sockeye Salmon

Member
Joined
Mar 28, 2018
Messages
89
I am so fucked in the head right now. Nothing is going right for me and I have no friends or place to vent to, no alcohol, no drugs, nothing. Everything is on a downward spiral and I just can't do it anymore. I wish I'd just drop dead now because I don't see any way out of this.
 
F

foxdie

Got my ticket
Joined
Aug 18, 2020
Messages
1,019
Gummy said:
I am so fucked in the head right now. Nothing is going right for me and I have no friends or place to vent to, no alcohol, no drugs, nothing. Everything is on a downward spiral and I just can't do it anymore. I wish I'd just drop dead now because I don't see any way out of this.

Vent here friend :hug:. I think a lot of us can relate to your feelings on this site. Or make your own thread, there are a lot of supportive ppl here, don't be shy to express yourself.
 
Sockeye Salmon

Sockeye Salmon

Member
Joined
Mar 28, 2018
Messages
89
I don't think my vents warrant it's own thread. I would just be spamming if I create a thread for every minor vent I have. I'm still pissed that the discord servers for this site always get taken down. It was an easy and convenient way to vent and chat with others alike on my PC and my phone.

I'm just so fucking scared. I can't see anything realistically happening in the future that is good in any way.
 
F

foxdie

Got my ticket
Joined
Aug 18, 2020
Messages
1,019
Gummy said:
I don't think my vents warrant it's own thread. I would just be spamming if I create a thread for every minor vent I have. I'm still pissed that the discord servers for this site always get taken down. It was an easy and convenient way to vent and chat with others alike on my PC and my phone.

I'm just so fucking scared. I can't see anything realistically happening in the future that is good in any way.

Don't be scared to vent on here in here on your own threads. I can't promise everyone will always be supportive but I feel a majority will. Do what you are comfortable with :hug:
 
painoflife

painoflife

Arcanist
Joined
Jul 27, 2019
Messages
413
Really struggling more and more each day now, it is so hard to keep up the act of "I'm ok" that everyone just expects. It feels so physically and mentally tiring being like this (combined with getting 4-5 hours of broken sleep a night means I am constantly exhausted). I feel like I constantly have arguments with myself in my head and of course I am never satisfied with the outcome.
I hate that "professionals" keep throwing different diagnosis at me, but never say I don't have previous ones. It is like an ever growing list of contradictions and is just more fuel for my mind to convince myself enough is enough. Why do I put myself through this? Because I am too weak to even end it properly. I had the means but messed it up and now I am stuck and scared it will go wrong again and I will have to face the fallout afterwards.
I've got to the point where I even considered whether being admitted to inpatient would be best right now, that is how desperate and messed up I am! Of course that is stupid to consider because it wont help at all (probably feel even worse/trapped while there) and also they literally told me that wont admit me and removed me from the waiting list last time crisis team put me on it. So do I take that to mean I can just do attempt after attempt and even if it fails or I get caught they will just send me on my merry way? Or do I take it to mean that I shouldn't bother to ask for help because they wont give me any? (Not that I think they can do anything to actually help, I just dont like this feeling of not being safe with myself). Or does it simply mean they dont care? Probably all 3 of them really.
Sorry for the ramble, things are just a real struggle for me at the moment and I dont even know how to express what is going on in my head.
 
Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
20,798
Squiddy said:
Slightly sleep deprived lol. My mania and the fake earthquakes I've been feeling have been mostly keeping me up. I did get 4 hours of sleep though and woke up an hour ago.
Fake earthquakes? Also, atleast you got some sleep.
 
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Joined
Sep 4, 2019
Messages
5,892
Brick In The Wall said:
Fake earthquakes? Also, atleast you got some sleep.
Yeah, I've been hallucinating the ground shaking. I mainly feel it in bed when doing anything, but I've also felt it on the couch and when I was in my car at the store. So far since waking up, I haven't felt it though :)

GenesAndEnvironment said:
Damn, dat sux
Yeah :( I'm hoping I can get more sleep tonight
 
Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
20,798
Squiddy said:
Yeah, I've been hallucinating the ground shaking. I mainly feel it in bed when doing anything, but I've also felt it on the couch and when I was in my car at the store. So far since waking up, I haven't felt it though :)


Yeah :( I'm hoping I can get more sleep tonight
That sounds a bit concerning. Do you have any idea why that's happening?
 
BitterlyAlive_

BitterlyAlive_

-
Joined
Dec 8, 2020
Messages
1,766
Squiddy said:
I'm pretty sure it's because of my bipolar, but my nurse practitioner said he thinks I have Schizoaffective disorder. He's the 3rd person to say he thinks I have that instead.
Fuck, Squiddy. Third person, huh? Do you feel any kinda way towards this supposed diagnosis?
 
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