The SS lounge

[Xion]

My curse is confirmed and I have no fucking idea how to break it. No one seems to know either. Am I doomed to be murdered by it powerless ?

 

[Glowarm]

Do you have any idea on what you want? I have an entire folder at this point with ideas lol

Yes, I'm getting a full sized raven in July. This will be my 15th tattoo. Not sure what if anything I'll get after this, don't have anything planned atm.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I was freaking out earlier. S.S. wasn't working. I did see the pm after I was able to find it on twitter to log in.
Whew!!!!

 

[Efilismislife]

I was freaking out earlier. S.S. wasn't working. I did see the pm after I was able to find it on twitter to log in.
Whew!!!!

ME TOO
i keep checking and waiting im afraid if its taken down by the selfish crazy angry mobs whos been attacking

then i try to check SS twitter and finally i can go back here

Hi Callme,
No I can’t turn it around but thanks for the thought. It’s either keep going with these things while also having new things to pop up and old age also or quit. I’ve been standing at the crossroads for a long time. I hope things can work out for you.

This is what i feel too n reminds me of a lyrics

"But when youre standing at a crossroads
theres a choice u gotta make

guess its gonna have to hurt
guess its gonna break me down
like fallin when you try to fly

sad but sometimes
moving on with the rest of your life
starts with goodbye

i know theres a blue horizon
somewhere up ahead waiting for me
getting there means leaving things behind
sometimes lifes so bitter sweet"

I know it’s never going to get better for me. It’s not possible. So I keep asking myself why do I continue to stay when I know the only thing ahead is suffering.

Asking myself that same question everyday all the time

 

[OctoberDusk]

Not sure why I want to share this, but when I saw the image of the black hole at the center of the Milky Way this morning, one of the first things to spring to mind was a Simpsons quote, "Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?"

If you've not seen it:

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Just ate an entire can of lays stacks chips.

 

[wljourney]

Just ate an entire can of lays stacks chips.

How can that be a bad thing?!?

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

How can that be a bad thing?!?

It is when you are as fat as I am.

 

[wljourney]

It is when you are as fat as I am.

Naw. Body positivity!
I’m fat too and yes, sometimes I eat a whole pizza or a whole bag of chips.
In the grand scheme of things… when you die… you won’t be thinking of that roll of chips. Pretty sure.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Naw. Body positivity!
I’m fat too and yes, sometimes I eat a whole pizza or a whole bag of chips.
In the grand scheme of things… when you die… you won’t be thinking of that roll of chips. Pretty sure.

Just finished 3 ice cream cones.

 

[wljourney]

Just finished 3 ice cream cones.

I just had a Magnum truffle double chocolate. Nom nom nom.

 

[OctoberDusk]

It is when you are as fat as I am.

Naw. Body positivity!
I’m fat too and yes, sometimes I eat a whole pizza or a whole bag of chips.
In the grand scheme of things… when you die… you won’t be thinking of that roll of chips. Pretty sure.

Hey, if you don't mind my being "that guy" and ruining the fun, I went from 440lbs (199kgs) to 210lbs (95kg) between 2018 and 2020. I've been in the 210-220 range since. I can talk about what helped me if you're interested (mainly keeping track, getting away from highly processed/high glycemic index foods, better learning to cook, and avoiding eating in front of TVs and computers).

Thought I'd mention it as I spent most of my life filled with self-loathing over the weight and not understanding why I felt there was a void inside me I couldn't fill. (Now I think it was mostly blood sugar spikes and crashes causing an endless craving cycle from so much pasta, cold cereal, and fast food).

If you're not interested, please ignore this and sorry to intrude.

 

[Manaaja]

Fuck I saw this and instantly felt a lot worse:

"Promise me you won't commit suicide"

I've been feeling really bad, sad and suicidal lately, and today I was supposed to have my weekly social worker meeting, but at the last second she suddenly changed the time from 3pm to 1pm, and of course it didn't work for me, so she cancelled the meeting. (It was a meeting where she comes to...

sanctioned-suicide.org

Also, ducking in an FPS. I thought about leaving this site permanently. Logging off, closing all the tabs on the browser, deleting the bookmark, maybe pressing the self-ban button, and now I'm still here. This place has some kind of hypnotic effect on me. So many times I have thought "Now I'll leave permanently" and 12 hours later I haven't slept at all because I literally just spent 12 hours here.

I need to install some kind of website blocker that kicks me out of here.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Fuck I saw this and instantly felt a lot worse:

"Promise me you won't commit suicide"

I've been feeling really bad, sad and suicidal lately, and today I was supposed to have my weekly social worker meeting, but at the last second she suddenly changed the time from 3pm to 1pm, and of course it didn't work for me, so she cancelled the meeting. (It was a meeting where she comes to...

sanctioned-suicide.org

Also, ducking in an FPS. I thought about leaving this site permanently. Logging off, closing all the tabs on the browser, deleting the bookmark, maybe pressing the self-ban button, and now I'm still here. This place has some kind of hypnotic effect on me. So many times I have thought "Now I'll leave permanently" and 12 hours later I haven't slept at all because I literally just spent 12 hours here.

I need to install some kind of website blocker that kicks me out of here.

I can't leave either. I don't want to anyway. I don't post like I did a few years ago but I need to be able to talk or vent to people who understand. I hope you won't leave but if you need to for health reasons, I understand.

 

[Deadhead Frank]

I can't leave either. I don't want to anyway. I don't post like I did a few years ago but I need to be able to talk or vent to people who understand. I hope you won't leave but if you need to for health reasons, I understand.

I agree. I cant and don’t want to leave either. The site helps me too. The only way out of here for me is the graveyard. The suicidlaity is permanent now. Good to see you by the way. I hope you are doing ok. I enjoy seeing some of the old members even though not many are left. It’s a weird feeling to have been standing at the crossroads for so long watching others come and go. What’s even weirder is just spanning time and living like this now.

I hope things can work out for you too @Manaaja however you want them too.

 

[Xion]

I accidentally bought a santa claus melon... That's a thing apparently *it distracts me from the pain a little*

 

[Xion]

Well I've had the first exorcist on the phone today, he said he found a curse placed on me by my genitors and entities in my apartment where I attempted suicide and stayed between life and death for 4 days and that he blocked them so I should be free and see things get better within a week. All of that is way beyond me as I know nothing about black magic, if it even exists or not so I'm giving this the benefit of the doubt, he was a recommendation of a therapist who was taking that seriously, but I hope it's true so I can actually get to live freely now and meet my needs. I'm observing how things go from now on. This is curious for sure.

 

[Xion]

2 crazy things that happened today because it's hilarious :

#1 : I'm listening to a resistant (usually not sketchy, though they say some dumb stuff occasionnally but the guests looked interesting this time) live about courage and how to fix our society and all of a sudden one of the guest is like "I used to be a hitman when I was 14 and I eventually served some time because of it" super seriously, like WHAT ??! This has to be the craziest thing I've heard in a long time...

Follow up explation of why he did it (this is in France I have to mention, not Afghanistan) : "I was lazy so I didn't have any other skills and didn't think about the implications"

The people hosting the live were like "Excuse me, WHAT DID YOU SAY ? CAN WE HAVE AN EXPLANATION ?" Crazy stuff...

#2 : Latest guy to like me on a dating site was this glorious guy who's photo cracked me up (no I'm not into that at all to be clear lol, WTF) :

 

[Crazy4u]

I miss you all deeply. I forgot my password and my protonmail password and couldn't login for a long time. I was finally able to recover my account

Many names are new but some names look familiar. For people who don't know me, my previous usernames were Small_Dreams and freemindnsoul

 

[callme]

A blind guy holds a cheese grater. After exploring its front with his hands all confused, he utters "Who wrote that bullshit?!"

 

[noname223]

Was this forum only for me down? Like several hours. I could not access this website. Noone mentioned it. Maybe I was the only one.

There are also a lot of bugs for me.

 

[Lily (Osako)]

Was this forum only for me down? Like several hours. I could not access this website. Noone mentioned it. Maybe I was the only one.

There are also a lot of bugs for me.

I couldn’t access the site, either. There are a couple of functions that aren’t working for me now.
I think the site is having some issues. Nothing to worry about.
I wonder how many people we cross paths with in everyday life that feel the way we do, or maybe are even on this (or another) site.
I wonder if there are a lot of us, or are we a tiny portion of society that thinks about, contemplates, or are actively planning their end of life.

 

[Eternally Dottie]

I couldn’t access the site, either. There are a couple of functions that aren’t working for me now.
I think the site is having some issues. Nothing to worry about.
I wonder how many people we cross paths with in everyday life that feel the way we do, or maybe are even on this (or another) site.
I wonder if there are a lot of us, or are we a tiny portion of society that thinks about, contemplates, or are actively planning their end of life.

Yes the site was definitely down today for at least 5 hours.

 

[TheLastK]

I worry this whole forum is dead or nearing death. There are so few places like this online and I need people like yourselves to help. Maybe I've just become unlucky again.

 

[Deadhead Frank]

I worry this whole forum is dead or nearing death. There are so few places like this online and I need people like yourselves to help. Maybe I've just become unlucky again

If the forum were to go away it would totally screw a lot of people. It would cause more ctb. People depend on this forum and it has provided me with a lot of tools and info that are valuable. It is a safe place to escape or distract from the bullshit of society. Now we know that there are others out there like this too. It’s a shame how hard it would be for any new potential members to be able to find this place now and not even accessible in some areas supposedly.

I dont think I would be able to find this place if it were to change names or anything like that. I’m not aware of any others like this and if there were I wouldn’t know how to find them.

 

[TheLastK]

I dont think I would be able to find this place if it were to change names or anything like that. I’m not aware of any others like this and if there were I wouldn’t know how to find them.

Yeah that does sound scary, wish there were more sites like this (Not to bash on this site of course seems really nice so far).

 

[finish.me]

i wanna go to whole foods and steal shitty bougie beer so i could drink it while i rewatch doctor who

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

i wanna go to whole foods and steal shitty bougie beer so i could drink it while i rewatch doctor who

Fill up the TARDIS and bring me some.

 

[Deadhead Frank]

I noticed that SS doesn’t come up in my search engine anymore on any of them. So I have to know the exact url to get here which I do but wanted to mention. Even when typing part of the name the rest used to pop up but not anymore. So idk how anybody new would ever find it. You guys just have it bookmarked or type in the exact address each time I guess? If I had just started this life and was searching for this website from scratch I seriously doubt I would find it.

Yeah finish me send some beer and then N my way too please. cheers

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Usually google or duck duck go bury it. If you include Twitter at the beginning it comes up. I had to play around with it. I think they are forced to do it because of the negative media coverage.
They don't understand how important this site is to us and future members. Yes people do choose to end their lives but that is a small number compared to the members it helps.
For some of us, we would have been long gone without it. Probably with more violent methods.