Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,630
I am almost lost for words because I am so pissed off with this world.it is a complete waste of time and I hate it.
I hate waking up in the morning and I hate my life.I have lost all hope and just want to end it.i am not scared to go.I feel totally trapped here because of my 9 year old son.This is so not fair.I can't die without him! I need to know what the answer is and before anyone says ,can family have him,the answer is no because we do not have any .i am so tired of talking and maybe there are no words left to say or hear.!
 
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Peekaf

Peekaf

Dem Bones
Jul 8, 2018
35
I can sympathize as I have a 2 y/o old son and can relate to your feelings but you obviously can't take him with you.

I've decided to focus on the idea that he'd be better off without me, just as I was better off without my parents.
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,630
This is so hard.I don't think I can go on for much longer
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,630
I am so bloody depressed that I can not see why we shouldn't go together.my brain is f .this is my reality and has become a normal way of thinking.murder it may be but it's not like I will be sticking around for the consequences.f this world. I am done.
 
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Peekaf

Peekaf

Dem Bones
Jul 8, 2018
35
I am so bloody depressed that I can not see why we shouldn't go together.my brain is f .this is my reality and has become a normal way of thinking.murder it may be but it's not like I will be sticking around for the consequences.f this world. I am done.

I sincerely hope you find the peace that you need.
 
D

Decker

Member
Jun 12, 2018
95
Omg I understand you are depressed and life sucks I get it. I feel trapped as well and my kids are out of their teens. For gods sake I even feel trapped by my old dog. I believe your life....our lives are our right to take. But you have no right to take his. That’s his decision to make when he is older not yours. And you taking your life will screw him up but he has a chance to make something of himself., my life is pathetic and miserable but it’s not the same for my Kids. They both have a chance of a good life. He trusts you. I know of a man who jumped off a bridge and took his little boy with him. The boy survived his dad did not. Imagine how the boy now feels about his dad. I hate confortation and I’m sure you will not be happy to read what I said. In fact I have a really hard time putting my thoughts in to words. But I felt I had to say something. I’m sure your a really good person and good mom. Your son trusts you with all his heart at 9 years old!
 
Soon4me

Soon4me

Enlightened
Jun 15, 2018
1,591
I feel so sorry for you guys with kids.I just have parents and siblings to think of.Having kids aswell,I don't know how i could cope with that.
 
Peekaf

Peekaf

Dem Bones
Jul 8, 2018
35
I feel so sorry for you guys with kids.I just have parents and siblings to think of.Having kids aswell,I don't know how i could cope with that.

It adds another layer of confusion and in my case, self-loathing. That does not in any way diminish the struggles of those of you without kids though. We are all on the same ride
 
Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,630
It's a no win situation then Decker
He is stuffed to die with me or have a life time of suffering.!
 
Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,630
I am a good mum who does everything for my boy,yes he has seen me grieve.but there is no other option !
 
Peekaf

Peekaf

Dem Bones
Jul 8, 2018
35
I am a good mum who does everything for my boy,yes he has seen me grieve.but there is no other option !

I have no doubt that you are a good mother. However, just like us, your son has a chance to be happy as long as he is still alive. And just as you want to be able to make the decision to end your life, he should have that right as well.

I don't want to come down hard on you as it obviously won't help anything. Please, do not do that. If you love your son, you cannot do that to him.