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usernameforhere

Student
Joined
Nov 15, 2020
Messages
147
Weird few years, heck, weird life.

I was really badly depressed for months. Had mold on my ceiling, bad new roof work.

Found it, killed it, getting better. But the issues that bubbled up in the depression are still there. Ive struggled with something unusual for 3 years. Don't want to get into it, don't want to live in the old story. Writing a new story. It's unusual, let's just say that.

I had a feeling my aunt had information on it. I've asked her. Was talking to my mom about this. I said, call your sister, ask her, her hippie friends might have something like this going on. She called me back and said "oh yeah, she knows all about it. She will called you at 630."

Didn't get any information other then knows all about it. Its at crisis level now. I said its at crisis level now. No call. So I reached back out to my mom and she just curtly said ill deal with it tomorrow. Crisis level. Some urgency. I've been in pain for years. Its not like me to ask for help. Seriously. Is this way I dated a complete sociopath who tried to kill me. Maybe should have let him.

Do I manifest the negative experiences I have as an adult due to the fact people have information I need to resolve multi year pain and just won't give it to me because, idk, dude, self absorbed tv is good non sense way of being....

Why do I even bother with them. I know why, because having no one is awful................ but people who you say, i'm in pain, i've been in pain for years..................... its a crisis...... you have access to someone who can help, help, please..........

WTF.

No wonder I find every toxic person in America, I grew up surrounded by them.

Sorry. I just needed to get that out. I hope you're all doing ok.
 
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Midgardsorm

Midgardsorm

Bearer of the Curse
Joined
Apr 28, 2020
Messages
578
Hello !

Something unusual it's what caused my ocd to rise up to uncontrollable levels.

But about people around you being useless, I know the feeling, especially when it's your family. People who should be supporting you, people who you should be able to trust.

First things first. If you're alone in this world ... there's two things to have in mind, First: Trust yourself. Second: Expect the worst from people. Up until now it's all they gave us, right? If they're nice, we will be surprised, if they're not, at least we won't be disappointed.
Hard to live this way. It's kinda sad, but we didn't ask for that. It's just what we got.

In any case, I wish you the best.
 
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usernameforhere

Student
Joined
Nov 15, 2020
Messages
147
The Unblessed said:
Hello !

Something unusual it's what caused my ocd to rise up to uncontrollable levels.

But about people around you being useless, I know the feeling, especially when it's your family. People who should be supporting you, people who you should be able to trust.

First things first. If you're alone in this world ... there's two things to have in mind, First: Trust yourself. Second: Expect the worst from people. Up until now it's all they gave us, right? If they're nice, we will be surprised, if they're not, at least we won't be disappointed.
Hard to live this way. It's kinda sad, but we didn't ask for that. It's just what we got.

In any case, I wish you the best.
Thanks, I appreciate your thought. I’d want people to be decent, I know no one’s perfect and I don’t expect it. I’ll still hope for decent.
 
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