thendfornow

thendfornow

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Mar 29, 2022
46
I feel so bad that it's indescriptible. I am like a drug addict in withdrawals only that i don't take drugs. Every single day that goes by everything just get worse. My mind. My health. All time does is make things worse. I am fucking sick. I am fucking sick and done. SOMEONE KILL ME. I am so sick i may aswell try hardcore methods. I can't even get my hands on fucking SN and N is way too expensive for me. I may as well fucking jump, drink an awful mix of poisonous plants, loose my damn mind kill peoples and get killed by cops, steal a plane and crash with it whatever the FUCK is needed. I may as well. This is all too much to endure. I feel like im emotionally dying. help. I feel like im loosing my mind so much that i could even be dangerous to others at some point. I need to die now. NOW.
 
Dead Ghost

Dead Ghost

Mestre del Temps
May 6, 2022
243
I feel so bad that it's indescriptible. I am like a drug addict in withdrawals only that i don't take drugs. Every single day that goes by everything just get worse. My mind. My health. All time does is make things worse. I am fucking sick. I am fucking sick and done. SOMEONE KILL ME. I am so sick i may aswell try hardcore methods. I can't even get my hands on fucking SN and N is way too expensive for me. I may as well fucking jump, drink an awful mix of poisonous plants, loose my damn mind kill peoples and get killed by cops, steal a plane and crash with it whatever the FUCK is needed. I may as well. This is all too much to endure. I feel like im emotionally dying. help. I feel like im loosing my mind so much that i could even be dangerous to others at some point. I need to die now. NOW.
It's horrible to notice how your mind breaks to pieces, it's happened to me several (few) times this year and I've never been able to fix it, it goes away on its own in my case. Luckily they are short episodes, a few hours for a couple of days (except for 2019 which lasted me a week).
I'm sorry to hear that, especially if it's more persistent than in my case.
//
És horrible notar com s'et trenca la ment a pedaços, m'ha passat diverses vegades (poques) aquest anys i no ho he pogut sol·lucionar mai, desapareix per si sol en el meu cas. La sort es que són episodis de curta durada, unes hores durant un parell de dies (excepte el 2019 que em va durar una setmana).
Sento molt que passis per això, de debó, sobretot si és més persistent que en el meu cas.



And as far as I don't understand what I mean, it has nothing to do with sadness or depression, it goes much further ... horrible.
//
I pel que no entengui a que em refereixo, no te rés a veure ni amb la tristesa, ni la depressió, va molt més enllà... horrible.
 
thendfornow

thendfornow

-
Mar 29, 2022
46
It's horrible to notice how your mind breaks to pieces, it's happened to me several (few) times this year and I've never been able to fix it, it goes away on its own in my case. Luckily they are short episodes, a few hours for a couple of days (except for 2019 which lasted me a week).
I'm sorry to hear that, especially if it's more persistent than in my case.
//
És horrible notar com s'et trenca la ment a pedaços, m'ha passat diverses vegades (poques) aquest anys i no ho he pogut sol·lucionar mai, desapareix per si sol en el meu cas. La sort es que són episodis de curta durada, unes hores durant un parell de dies (excepte el 2019 que em va durar una setmana).
Sento molt que passis per això, de debó, sobretot si és més persistent que en el meu cas.



And as far as I don't understand what I mean, it has nothing to do with sadness or depression, it goes much further ... horrible.
//
I pel que no entengui a que em refereixo, no te rés a veure ni amb la tristesa, ni la depressió, va molt més enllà... horrible.
Yes my mind is also totally breaking and it also goes away on its own most of the time. It goes in cyclic episodes i noticed. Honestly it all just make me feel more insane. The only way out of this is to die. No choice. I dont know.if its depression sadness whatever. I just know it is insanely dark and that im loosing my mind. I just know that i am absolutely insane.
 
Last edited:
Dead Ghost

Dead Ghost

Mestre del Temps
May 6, 2022
243
Yes my mind is also totally breaking and it also goes away on its own most of the time. It goes in cyclic episodes i noticed. Honestly it all just make me feel more insane. The only way out of this is to die. No choice. I dont know.if its depression sadness whatever. I just know it is insanely dark and that im loosing my mind. I just know that i am absolutely insane.
I don't know if it will work for you, but it started for me a year after having an unrealization crisis in February 2018 due to a water leak from the neighbors upstairs who didn't want to fix it and by the time they did I had already cracked, I spent two weeks looking at everything in a pink / red hue and I had a hard time recognizing my house and my things, I didn't recognize them as such ... nobody cared about me but since then every time I have a severe anxiety crisis I am drifting towards what you are suffering from and I am really scared to go crazy and lose myself.

If it happens to me more often I am not sure what I would do or if it would be possible for me to make any decision about it. I'm just clear that I lost pressure tolerance and I think that if I regained it a bit I might be able to minimize these episodes if it happened, but I may be wrong and be just a false hope.

No se si et servirà pas, però a mi em va començar un any després de tenir un crisi de desrealització el febrer del 2018 per una fuita d'aigua dels veïns de dalt que no volien pas arreglar i per quan ho van fer jo ja havía petat, vaig passar-me dues setmanes veien't-ho tot amb una tonalitat rosa/vermellosa i em costava reconèixer casa meva i les meves coses, no les reconeixia com a tal... ningú em va fotre ni cas però desde llavors cada cop que tinc una forta crisi d'ansietat s'em deriva cap això que pateixes i realment tinc por de tornar-me boig i perdre'm de mi mateix.

Si em passés de forma més recurrent no tinc clar que faría o si sería possible que pogués prendre cap decisió al respecte. Només tinc clar que vaig perdre tolerància a la pressió i penso que si la recuperés una mica potser podría minimitzar aquests episodis en cas de produïr-se, però puc estar equivocat i ser només una falsa esperança.
 
thendfornow

thendfornow

-
Mar 29, 2022
46
I don't know if it will work for you, but it started for me a year after having an unrealization crisis in February 2018 due to a water leak from the neighbors upstairs who didn't want to fix it and by the time they did I had already cracked, I spent two weeks looking at everything in a pink / red hue and I had a hard time recognizing my house and my things, I didn't recognize them as such ... nobody cared about me but since then every time I have a severe anxiety crisis I am drifting towards what you are suffering from and I am really scared to go crazy and lose myself.

If it happens to me more often I am not sure what I would do or if it would be possible for me to make any decision about it. I'm just clear that I lost pressure tolerance and I think that if I regained it a bit I might be able to minimize these episodes if it happened, but I may be wrong and be just a false hope.

No se si et servirà pas, però a mi em va començar un any després de tenir un crisi de desrealització el febrer del 2018 per una fuita d'aigua dels veïns de dalt que no volien pas arreglar i per quan ho van fer jo ja havía petat, vaig passar-me dues setmanes veien't-ho tot amb una tonalitat rosa/vermellosa i em costava reconèixer casa meva i les meves coses, no les reconeixia com a tal... ningú em va fotre ni cas però desde llavors cada cop que tinc una forta crisi d'ansietat s'em deriva cap això que pateixes i realment tinc por de tornar-me boig i perdre'm de mi mateix.

Si em passés de forma més recurrent no tinc clar que faría o si sería possible que pogués prendre cap decisió al respecte. Només tinc clar que vaig perdre tolerància a la pressió i penso que si la recuperés una mica potser podría minimitzar aquests episodis en cas de produïr-se, però puc estar equivocat i ser només una falsa esperança.
we are lost dude. death.